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dear labels! - hobo johnson lyrics

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oh, here’s a story for ya
two chickens walking down the street
it’s actually one chicken

one chicken walks down the street
looks across the road to another chicken
he sees an older chicken
much more plump than he’s used to
and the other chicken goes

hey what’s up? yeah
what’s the deal with young chickens? i
want an older chicken that knows that grown business
ya know?
i’m narcissistic, look at me
i’m an artist ebt
couldn’t help the fact i’m starving for that mtv
and a deal, but a three sixty one at that
but it’d be pretty sh-tty i’d be sitting pretty where i’m at
pay my rent and i’ll sell you my soul
if you could please just trade it for a french bread roll
i’m f-cking starving, look at me
now dear labels, can’t you see
i’m the one that f-cking bleeds
tears and sweats every day of the week

now look at me
i won’t write you a f-cking pop song
but i’ll write you a -n-lytical thesis about your mom
and why she’s a great woman
look at me
i want it more than anything else that i could ever f-cking be
look at me
now look at me
i can kinda play piano but
but not really

look at me, look at me
look at me, look at me
look at me, i’m alright
right? please
look at me, look at me
look at me, look at me, i’m alright
dear labels, uh

but on a day that’s not so far
you’re gonna hear me whether you like it or not
on a day that’s not so far
you’re gonna hear me whether you like it or not
whether you like it or not, ’cause
’cause i’m 2016 fat joe
who just did seven and a half years of straight cardio
i’m rap game’s house
except i’m not a f-cking doctor though
wow
tell them labels i’m everything they’d ever want
if all they want is a rapper that calls his mom, daily
just to see what’s going on
’cause he misses her and
she misses her baby
please help me

please, help me find my mom a house
that i could go to every f-cking weekend, please
please, please, help me buy my mom a house
that i could go to every f-cking weekend

i’m an artist with a certain special something
and that something makes me really really sad, because of nothing
i’m an artist with a certain special something
and that something makes me really really sad, because of nothing
i’m an artist with a certain special something
and that something makes me really really sad, because of nothing
i’m an artist with a certain special something
and that something makes me really really sad, because of nothing
i’m an artist with a certain special something
and that something makes me really really sad, because of nothing

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