gfx_v1.mp3 - hitbox (hardcore) lyrics
[sample]
i spotted you the moment you came to live with us
you worked hard like the other farmhands, but you were different
you were from somewhere; a nice, comfortable place that you could return to whenever you wanted
i’m so desperate to have that
all my life i’ve wanted off this farm and you were my ticket out
so… i made sure to never let you see who i really was
worked like a charm, too
then, you finally brought me back to your home to meet your family and it was just as i hoped
like straight out of the pictures
at least that’s what it felt like to me
but you didn’t want it
[hitbox]
lately i’ve been trying to be honest with myself
stop numbing my brain finally put a name to my disease
stop accepting the cloud looming over
stop accepting that i’ll always feel this
sense of loss
emptiness
i’ll rise above this mountain of shame
it’s so easy to convince myself it’s all my fault
just as easy to bury my head into the sand
nuance isn’t my strong suit
all or nothing here
am i innocent or
is it all on me
what’s the boundary
how do i draw a line
how much of my life
do i get to blame on you
how can i ignore all the steps that
i took on my own time
how much was influenced by you
[sample]
i know what i’ve done
bad things
terrible, awful, murderous things
i regret them now, but i liked how they felt
i wish i didn’t, but i did
at first, it was only animals smaller than myself
nothing with feelings, nothing that could hurt me back
felt good
k!lling’s easier than you’d think
[hitbox]
nine years old
coming home with tears in my eyes
while you still held all my trust i came to you for help
but you wouldn’t take my word, i was just a kid
i had to be lying i’m the one who f*cked up
laying in the kitchen tears are streaming down my face
punished, confused, screaming i don’t understand
hurting based on rumors i can’t even comprehend
mother says she believes me but doesn’t raise a f*cking hand
now what
how do
i forget about it or the habits
it brought
to be ostracized
used to
being
excluded from everything
and now that
i have friends
don’t know what to feel
red rover, red rover
send someone the f*ck over
innocent in my intention couldn’t predict it would happen
over, and over
plays inside my f*ckin head
i was far too young to sit and wish that i was f*cking dead
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