morning mutes - hightide hotel lyrics
i remember when you said from the far side of the bed it “felt like it set your fingertips on fire” every time that we held hands
you always hid your head beneath a winter’s-worth of blankets when you admitted to your thoughts, so hesitant, so slow, and short of breath
as if both born mute, we choose to pen our thoughts instead: a written record of the inside of our heads
coming-to at noon while skipping work or cl-sses to catch the sunlight as it caught each strand of our eyelashes
and it was hard to feel much guilt, and even harder not to shake, when i would wake to our alarms paired with the stillness of your sleeping face
motionless mornings spanned out into quiet afternoons, both unaware and without care of the world outside our rooms
and i am young. and i’m alive. and i will not apologize, not for what feels right
we’re keeping quiet because we’d hate to be found out. my mind’s a riot, alive with hope, and with a rising doubt
there is a place for all this fear, although there’s no spare room in my bed
it’s built for two, just me and you, leaving no room for our anxiety, or fear, or for any of our regret
and i just don’t feel that sorry for this yet, and i won’t anytime too soon i’ll bet
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