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pepsi vs coke - harvey seasalt lyrics

pepsi:

look at this little b*tch in the red can
ain’t even a 10th as good as i am
k!llin opposition quick is my plan
and this is the d*mn attack on titan
slingshot a rock at the head of the beast
i’m the better drink
and i got the receipts
a nationwide test from the west to the east
wanna guess who the best is?
read it and weep
you suck and everybody knew itbut the pepsi challenge undoubtedly proved it
you look parched, in need of some fluid
take a lil sip * b*tch taste the music
you’re 12 ouncеs of disappointment
im boutta k!ll the king and then gеt anointedwelcome to your first skull*f*cking appointment
no vaseline just a tube of some ointment
classic coke, gross its old news
a dusty fossil
i’m new and improved
im the best and i’m blue
b*tch im coming with that hot sh*t
your d*mn can is the color of a dog d*ck [dog whimper]
and i don’t wanna get too off topic
but if i keep thinking of you i might vomit
and just incase no one told ya
you ain’t been sh*t
since they took the cocaine out your cola ….. b*tch

coke:

what you think this is, some kinda joke?
you really wanna do this dance with king coke?
hmm okay lets see
lets count the reasons folks love pepsi
1… i got nothin
but im ready to beat you down so start duckin (huh)
*n0body likes you b*tch so quit frontin
i’ll treat you like a p*rnstar treats his step cousin
somebody oughta stop this god*awful knock off
hand me a glock and i’ll pop a shot off
one in the dome ain’t n0body gonna speak out
they’ll just laugh as your insides leak out
yeah, you had that pepsi challenge
tried to make the score just a little more balanced
and people liked you after one sip
but by sip three they smelt the horse sh*t, (oooo)
so wave the white flag and just forfeit
you look like death and your taste is morbid
….i’m the king, you ain’t nothing but a jester
a taste*bud molester
a market infester
allyour investors, better pull out now
quick spread the word ya’ll get it around town
pepsi’s the new worst bubbly drink
an ug*a*ly fink
can’t wait to watch your company sink
i hate when people compare you to me
that’s like * comparing kwame brown to kobe
the only motherf*ckers who still drink your sh*t
are poor souls who dont know what real coke is
from the year you were born
all the way to today
the one constant thats remained the same
is when a waiter says sorry no coke today
they get stabbed if they ask me “is pepsi okay?”

- harvey seasalt lyrics

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