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pretending - gates (nj) lyrics

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i made promises not worth keeping
spoke in lies that i don’t believe in
then when there was nothing left to say
i would go on anyway

loaned my love to a common thief and
made my peace with the wrong diseases
wondering like a wide*eyed memory
why i still can’t walk away

left to think in a foreign accent
stolen words and adopted habits
all the pains that were never even mine
so i could imagine your life
lеad to light that had long been dying
i don’t know why i even tried whеn
all along it would never cross my mind
that i was pretending you were right

buried deep like a darkest secret
covered up till i couldn’t see it
when there was no place left that i could hide
i’d erase and overwrite

brought along on a borrowed errand
out for blood in an aisle left barren
but there was nothing left for me to find
that was even worth my time
left to think in a foreign accent
stolen words and adopted habits
all the pains that were never even mine
so i could imagine your life
lead to light that had long been dying
i don’t know why i even tried when
all along it would never cross my mind
that i was pretending you were right
pretending you were right

so why die when it’s not my sword to fall on?
and why try when i’m right where i belong?

i made promises not worth keeping
spoke in lies that i don’t believe in
all the pains that were never even mine
so i could imagine a life
born of blood and devoid of meaning
all the things i could never be
with all the love left leading on the lie

i’ve resigned, i am right where i belong

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