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pregnant women are smug [music songs version] - garfunkel & oates lyrics

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[verse 1]
pregnant women are smug
everyone knows it, n-body says it
because they’re pregnant

effing son of a gun
you think you’re so deep now
you give me the creeps
now that you’re pregnant

i can’t count all the ways how
you speak in clichés now

[skit]
g: so, do you want a boy or a girl?
o: oh, doesn’t matter as long as it’s healthy
g: really? ’cause i don’t feel like those two things are related at all. it’s not like one or the other
o: no, no, no, no, as long as it’s healthy, hm!

[verse 2]
i can’t wait to hear someone say
don’t care if it’s brain-dead
don’t care if it’s limbless
if it has a p-n-s

’cause pregnant women are smug
everyone knows it, n-body says it
because they’re pregnant

this zen world you’re enjoying
makes you really annoying

[skit]
g: so, is it a boy or a girl?
o: oh, we know, but we’re not telling
g: what are you gonna name it?
o: oh, we know, but we’re not telling
g: who’s the father?
o: oh, we know… but we’re not… telling…

[verse 3]
b-tch, i don’t really care
i was being polite now
since you have no life now
that you’re pregnant

you say you’re walking on air
you think that you’re glowing
but you had been ho-ing
and now you’re pregnant

you’re just giving birth now
you’re not mother earth now

[skit]
g: yeah, i have a lot going on. i got my degree, i moved, i wrote a novel–
o: gosh, everything just seems so trivial now that i’m pregnant
g: i also built a nuclear fusion reactor
o: you know, i can’t even remember what i did before i was pregnant. everything just seems so meaningless, hm!

[outro]
pregnant women are smug
everyone knows it, n-body says it
because they’re pregnant

effing son of a gun
you think you’re so deep now
you give me the creeps now
now that you’re pregnant

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