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setting the scene - funky dl lyrics

[verse 1]
let me tell you a story, cos it’s a good one
it’s all about this woman i met, she was a hoodlum
gangster, bandit, she set me up and planned it
and all because of her, my life was drowning in a sandpit
met her at an art gallery, began to chit-chat
she was kinda interesting, so we went to kick it a bar close by
got to drinking patrón
so got twisted to the point where she would follow me home
yo’, the morning after, laid in bed for half an hour
took a cold shower, washing her stench then took a towel
dried myself down, devoured some eggs and pancakes
she ate bran flakes, tying her hair, the band breaks
departed with handshakes instead of kisses
she stated “this was simply business, i’m not your mistress
your mrs, this ain’t christmas, don’t it twisted
i’m from a school of bad b-tches
can get you blistered and feed your body to the fishes”
she wrote a number on the back of some rizlas
“what is this?”, she said “a college kid they call the wizard
call him and pay visit and beware of all his lizards
he gone tell you bout’ religion and the time he spent in
prison, he talks a lot, but listen till he finish
then take this envelope and when you get there only give him
twenty grand from inside, he’s gonna count there’s nothing missing
then meet me at the ‘chung ho’ kitchens and mind the pigeons”

[verse 2]
arrived at the wizards, the door was already open
he was choking on a mouth-gag, his nose was broken
his clothes was soaked in petroleum, suffering pandemonium
i untied him quickly, asked him what the h-ll was going on?
he said he owed some money to some cold-hearted loan-sharks
and gotta pay them back within a week, or get some broke arms
then asked me, “where the money at?”
pulled out the brown bag
removed about half and gave this dude his twenty grand
then he said he need the rest, i wasn’t down with that
so he started raising his voice, “yo’ who you shouting at?
you may be crazy, but you ain’t gone get my paper”
he made a sudden move, that’s when he fired off his taser
which hit me in the blazer and i fell face down
i’m trying to get up, he kicked me and kept yelling “stay down”
and all i’m thinking is w.t.f., now ain’t this some bs?
i can’t speak, he tased me, i’m speechless

[verse 3]
i wake up in the back of a squad car, handcuffs
officer to my left, overweight, dandruff
bad breath, wedding ring, thinking who would marry that?
fifteen minutes looking out the window
now we at the precinct, fingerprints, mug shot, phone call
put the money in the slot and leaned myself against the wall
5-5-5-, called the chung ho chinese
she came on the line, i asked her straight ,“why me?”
she laughed, and said she need a scapegoat
someone she could manipulate to handle them fake notes
cos’ she was being staked by the counterfeit cops
she got a tip about a bust and so she set me up
she said don’t take it personal, i hope the judge is merciful
but you gone do some time, i hope you know that’s irreversible
my money ran out, my phone time was up
i placed the receiver down and then my cell door shut

- funky dl lyrics

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