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numb - freya niamh lyrics

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i know i’ve got nothing to prove so why do i seem to lose
every piece of me when i’m with you?
an autopilot robot
it’s not fun to be numb on second thoughts, but
i’ve come to far to stop

well i’ve f*cked up
cos maybe, all this waiting’s a waste
it’s worth convincing my brain
today is the day to say i don’t deserve to stay
a shadow of my former self
it’s not weak to ask for help

i miss my friends that i knew loved me and my flaws
there was no second guessing whispers and missed calls
i didn’t have to force a smile, a laugh, or even hide
the fact that i was feeling so small

well i f*cked up
cos maybe, i pushed you all away
it’s worth convincing my brain
you’re not alone but on your own
you’re as whole as you can be
they show their love differently
you’ll learn to see it eventually
but for now it’s time to gather up my thoughts
i fought for too long with the voices he brought
i wanna write him all away
each letter dissipates the aching chest and pain of yesterday

i blame the doubt you left behind
it’s been some time since you’ve come to mind
but since you’re back i can’t focus right
i’m sick of using you to prove that silence is the truth
i lost my faith in words, your games
run through my head on replay

ooh
i’ll replace your empty words with pages of verse
ooh
it’s the only way to make myself feel like me again

now i’m somewhere far from home
i’m only starting to feel like i’ve grown
out of loving something hollow
i know it takes time to heal
and you’ll always come and go, i know

but now i know i’ll never feel
your control of me that was never real
at all
ooh

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