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lonesome cowboy burt - frank zappa & the mothers lyrics

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[verse 1]
my name is burtram
i am a redneck
all my friends
they call me burt
(hi, burt)
all my family
from down in texas
make their livin’ diggin’ dirt
come out here to californ*y
just to find me
some pretty girls
ones i seen
gets me so h*rny
ruby lips
and t**th like pearls

[pre*chorus]
wanna love ’em all
wanna love ’em dearly
want a pretty girl
i’ll even pay
i’ll buy ’em furs
i’ll buy ’em jewelry
i know they like me
here’s what i say
[chorus]
i’m lonesome cowboy burt
(speakin’ atcha)
come smell my fringe*y shirt
(reekin’ atcha)
my cowboy pants
my cowboy dance
my bold advance
on this here waitress
yodel*oh*oo*pee*hey
yodel*oh*oo*pee
(he’s lonesome cowboy burt)
(don’tcha get his feelings hurt)
come on in this place
and i’ll buy you a taste
you can sit on my face—
where’s my waitress?

[refrain]
burtram, burtram redneck
burtram, burtram redneck

[verse 2]
i’m an awful nice guy
sweat all day in the sun
roofer by trade
quite a bundle i’ve made
i’m unionized roofin’ old son*of*a*gun
(he’s a unionized roofin’ old son*of*a*gun)
when i get off, i get plastered
drink ’til i fall on the floor
find me some communist b*st*rd
and stomp on his face ’til he don’t move no more
(he stomps on his face ’til he don’t move no more)
[pre*chorus]
i fuss, an’ i cuss an’ i keep on drinkin’
’til my eyes puff up an’ turn red
i drool on m’shirt
i see if he’s hurt
kick him again in the head, let’s
kick him again in the head, boys
kick him again in the head, now
kick him again in the head

[chorus]
lonesome cowboy burt!
(speakin’ atcha)
come smell my fringe*y shirt
(reekin’ atcha)
my cowboy pants
my cowboy dance
my bold advance
on this here waitress
yodel*oh*oo*pee*yeh
yodel*oh*oo*pee
(he’s lonesome cowboy burt
a*don’tcha get his feelin’s hurt)
yeah, but come on in this place
an’ i’ll buy you a taste
and you can sit on my face—
where’s my waitress?
[outro]
opal, you hot little b*tch

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