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my truth - flucee lyrics

[verse]
up at night all the time
want to be dead and gone
like i know that my words and my soul
will live on through these songs, i’m always prepared
and even for death i would want my family to be able to rest (yeah)
knowing that i am no longer depressed
and apart of this world that has become a mess
no, it’s not like it’s planned, yes, i know that i’m blessed
to have ever existed, it’s only for you, but now i digress (sh*t)
and i wonder if one day, you’ll hear this, my name rings in depths
and if i die young, know you b*tches’ll go
and move onto the next, look, my life is a wreck
but i hope that you know that i dismiss attention
while spinning this set cause the only attempts to impress
to go earn your respect, know this life is a card game
and i feel as if i’m at the top of the deck (f*ck)
knowing some’ll go pick on me ‘cause i will spit
like i sweated and bled, give me ‘lotta cred’
for this flow i’m perfecting ‘cause up until when
i had picked up the pen, i was feeling so lost
wouldn’t get out of bed now i’m never in bed (nope)
‘cause i work in the day to go home to my desk
to write me some lyrics so i give you no choice
but to play ‘em again (for real)
i feel that the people around me are fake and be snaking
to scr*pe up whatever they can, it gets harder to trust
cause i know i’m my only true friend ‘til i pass away
like it’s the end (for real), it gets harder to love ‘em when i’m written off
like i’m f*cked in the head, yes, i’m f*cked in the head
and i’m alone always fearing whatever’s next
while impatiently waiting for the drugs
that i took to go start their effect
i know some that’ll think that with me they’re connected (nope)
but the fact is that they have already been deaded
now i get erect when they feel they’re protected
i keep ’em around ’til they smoked for detection
i’ll wash ’em away like neglection and dreads and
my heart is too big, i forgive then regret it
there’s some that i thought’d be here ’til the end
then i learned i’ve been used like a hand*me*down bed (b*tch)
yet i still put ’em all ‘fore myself, f*ck my spending
i noticed i’m weak and been f*cked like i’m bending
i never been f*cked, i’m the one who will f*ck ’em
forget what they said, only held by a thread
if you lie on my name, face a puddle of red and
it’s never a threat, i got haters in town who i never had met
with my name in their head so it’s them i dissect
like a motherf*cking *n*lyst (haha)
my reputation i feel like abandoning
pick ’em apart like i’m picking a dandelion
day that i’m gone i’ll be called a true alchemist
making this album that is self empowerment
never caught eating with members of cowardice
all of these p*ssies know that i’d devour ’em (p*ssies)
and i’ll be fighting ’til i find my way out of this
cut my wrist and god’ll hold me accountable (for real)
claim i’m a b*tch? in that sense, i can’t counter it
yes i am short but my heights’ll be towering
rain when i rise like a f*cking sun shower and
if i don’t ever make it, then k!ll me like howard but
it’s all i been dreaming, wanna return to broward
saw a figure run by me at the very same hour
my dad had got hit and shut down like a browser
so later that night, chose to pop me a downer (xanny)
this life’s like a fight that we’re in for survival
i look up despite the regret of arrival
but all that i’m seeing is really an eyeful
that gets me aware that my friends are my rivals (for real)
most family pretend they are there but they’re trifles
my opps got me owning a good bit of rifles
my mind got me spinning in all these lil cycles
my heads in the clouds of the sky like the title (facts)
the drugs that i take f*ck around with my vitals
but caused me to write this album like a bible
i’m godly, worshiping ‘cause i am entitled
i’ll k!ll ‘em alone if that’s what i’m deciding
it’s f*ck the revenge, only do it for silence
you making some threats? on you like your disciple
i’ll be there to witness your breath that is final
i promise right after i’m sleeping just fine blood
cause i am a problem
this problem is one that you ain’t even thought of
the f*ck you expect from a kid with a heart of
a whole lotta hurt and betrayal from all ‘em
the truth is that now i’m a demon, osama, been louder (what?)
since the day i said i’m a goblin
my dad lookin’ up sayin’ “son, do not follow
the path i took cause you are truly way smarter” (b*tch)
i looked down and said to my dad
“you the cause of the place that i’m in at the moment
my father had let that last sight go down as sick and haunting
left scars on your daughter, you probably ain’t thought it” (coward)
mushrooms made me ponder if life could harder
to me, it’s a game in*which god will have chartered
the end after death, there’s a picture that’s larger
your birth is a chance to collect all your armor (yeah)
you die and you’re introduced to that b*tch karma
hold blades in your coat, pull ‘em out like it’s sparta
to protect your neck like wu*tang said, for starters
your life could be taken as soon as tomorrow (for real)
you popping them pills that you got from big pharma
now your vision blurred, it got you thinking darker
tip toeing around like you moving with caution
pretending your life is so good like it’s awesome (but it’s not)
i made me a promise to god, give me all it
i’ll bring a return and it won’t be forgotten
i’ll always be honest, give back what i’ve gotten
to only the pure and retire my momma (momma!)
i’m casing it all with a plot for a robbery
i aimed for the sky ‘cause i knew i could top it
this world’ll be taken and i’ll do it properly
b*tch better believe that my reign gonna shock ‘em

- flucee lyrics

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