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thoughts of an idle mind - finding aureus lyrics

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verse 1:
i’ve been lost, blinds shut tight
i know i won’t get through tonight
if you hear this, heed my warning
’cause this process has got boring
every day, every night
for two years, i’m losing sight
i drop the angst, and dropped the game
but every evening stays the same

pre*chorus:
oh, these thoughts of my idle mind
they were what held me behind
and somebody save me, somebody help me, somebody free me from this line

chorus:
i’ve spent a fеw years trying to be happy
and i don’t mean to gеt too sappy
i just want to feel like i’m loved too
i’ve been lost for a year
more moments bring me fear
but i write this message praying for life anew

verse 2:
i said some things that i now hate
if only i had a blank slate
i now hate some names of friends
if we’ll talk it all depends
i f*cked off and broke some binds
a whole ass summer of new finds
i drew some cards, played it dumb
that november i cut my thumb
verse 3:
i had nothing, i hate my face
i wanted to escape that place
before my eyes, nothing was real
and all i wanted was something to feel
when march hit, things went wrong
a k!ller roamed the streets, singing their song
and if may would come, i knew i’d see
it took a long time for me to feel free

pre*chorus:
oh, these thoughts of my idle mind
they were what held me behind
and somebody save me, somebody help me, somebody free me from this line

chorus:
i’ve spent a few years trying to be happy
and i don’t mean to get too sappy
i just want to feel like i’m loved too
i’ve been lost for a year
more moments bring me fear
but i write this message praying for life anew

verse 4:
a new summer, came and went
and by august, i was spent
i crashed my car and my mind with it
i thought my life turned to sh*t
now there i am, a month later
hurt my friends, grade f debater
it takes me six god d*mn weeks
to feel like my head has fewer leaks
verse 5:
i found out things wrong with me
it’s almost like someone heard my plea
here i sit, lying in bed
writing thoughts straight from my head
let the sounds of music play
tomorrow is when i’ll fade away
don’t forget, the sounds of the start
so what comes next is the best part

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