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i had my fun/back to the start - field medic lyrics

i had my fun til my fun turned in
to humiliation and a suicide scare
i try to lead with love
but i hurt everyone
that gets close enough
to show me that they care
i cry alone in my room or out back
with my finger down my throat
expelling shame i can’t bear
every day i say i’m done
till i see that setting sun
but tonight i’m gonna fight
white knuckle
i lost my passion and my looks
my stomach’s turning like a brook
i told my best friend i wanted to buy a gun
i don’t know how i wound up here
feels like i lost so many years
spend all my time saying sorry to everyone
sorry

i don’t know how i wound up here
the smallest thing brings me to tеars
and once their gone i am complеtely numb
i don’t know how i wound up here
i resent the insight of life experience
all these lessons only bring me harm
all these battles only leave me scarred
oh, how i long to go back to the start
oh, how i long to go back to the start

- field medic lyrics

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