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for the first time in years - father deer hands lyrics

[intro]

[verse 1]
tell me that i’m better than the me you used to know
when wasting life and k!lling time was all that i’d known
can barely stare you in the eyes, the fact that you’d know
though i’m not lonely, i still feel alone

[chorus]
i struggle to find myself this time
everything is so unfamiliar
’cause i woke up and didn’t want to die
for the first time in years
[verse 2]
feels like i’ll never grasp it
happy ending never happened
still forget that’s how you planned it
cut the loss, they’ve all moved past it
timing couldn’t be worse
never found a sense of self worth
made me feel something, it still hurts
bleed me out on show for the world

[chorus]
i struggle to find myself this time
everything is so unfamiliar
’cause i woke up and didn’t want to die
for the first time in years
don’t wait around until you finally get it right
until it’s finally clear
i opened up and let the sun inside
for the first time in years
i woke up and want to be alive
for the first time in years
i woke up and didn’t want to die
for the first time in years

[bridge]
moving forward, i know i’ll be alright
i can feel it from here
moving forward, i know i’ll be alright
i can feel it from here
[verse 3]
just let it go, forget me
who would’ve known that it’d be me?
i’m giving up to a degree
sad souls don’t float upstream
sad souls don’t float upstream

[chorus]
i struggle to find myself this time
i woke up and didn’t want to die

[outro]
you’ll find me falling faster
the story’s old let’s close this chapter
i’ll stop writing about it after
i kind of wish this never happened
paradise was bullsh*t
swear i felt it deep in my chest
never thought that life would crack me
giving up, i hope you’re happy

- father deer hands lyrics

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