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removing the mask - ettrick shepherd lyrics

[verse 1]
listen upi got a whole lot of sh-t to get out of my system
and now that shroud and the linen is no longer clouding my vision
i think it’s finally time i go hard and to town with a written
that expresses everything that’s ever gotten me down and no kidding
no playing round, jokes aside, please don’t think that i’m emo
cos you know my type of songs but you don’t know me though
i put up this false and fict-tious façade of feeling ego
centric but the truth is i need a hero
i’m begging for somebody to take me out of the madness
get me out i just wanna leave this planet
maybe i should give in to the havoc and snap
i’m about to have a motherf-cking panic attack
f-ck the lisp, lumps and lenses – i’ve copped so many l’s
and my friends just expect me to let go by myself
but i hope i get help cos it’s feels like i’ve been sewn to the shelf
god dammit, i’m going to h-ll
it’s these sorts of things that i would never lie about
i’m not looking for attention or sympathy or crying out
i’m not trying to give the public something to cry about
but honestly if life doesn’t get better then i am out

[verse 2]
i’m so sorry but at the same time i’m through with life
keep this between you and i but all i wanna do is cry
this my note, i hope there’s hope in a future life
because in this one nothing i ever do is right
cos i got so much hate for this earth
i never seemed to understand the way that it worked
or maybe this is just plate of dessert
that’s been painfully served and it’s just making it worse
and now i’m shaking with nerves
i know for a fact my life is h-ll
i got impaired balance and impaired sight as well
my blood is boiling but i kinda like the smell
i said i wouldn’t give in to the pain but i might as well
cos it’s been growing on me and now it’s a part of me
but i cover it up pretty well and that’s why it’s hard to see
feels like i’m playing the wrong sport on the wrong court
and a feeling of belonging is the only thing i long for
bet you thought i had gotten it all off my chest
you were wrong to guess cos i’ve been falling again
i don’t know if it’s writing on the walls or test
all i know is i’ve resorted to jamming my paws in the meds

[verse 3]
i tell them i won’t let them judge me
you don’t know me
it’s recommended that you never touch me
i’m getting rusty
i got family and friends that love me
but whenever i mention love or invest in something it always ends up ending ugly
i can hardly move forward cos i’m always lookin’ back
and daydreaming about the utopian mind i could’ve had
my mind blows out of proportion the tiniest of things
it’s almost like there’s absolutely no life in me, it stings
but all i’m tryna do is show and express
hope the emotions freeze so i can go to the end
can’t help but think the gr-ss is greener over the hedge
don’t try and relate if you ain’t felt close to the edge
it slumped for abit but now i’m at the peak of the pain
my mind is hollow as a log but should i feel ashamed?
it’s the hardest situation that i’ve seen to this day
so i do music cos it’s the only thing i have a reason to make
yes, people ask me what’s the point in making music
i don’t just make it, i use it cos for me it’s therapeutic
and that’s exactly why i continue to keep keeping on
that’s me letting you in and now the feelings gone

- ettrick shepherd lyrics

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