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all on me - ethan bence lyrics

[verse 1]
does love always follow with depression?
cause i feel like i’ve been told before but never learned my lesson
keep going back to it, stay chasing after it
feel like turning to the bottle looking for the messages
it’s stressful, i never could remember being miserable
now i can’t remember joy, looking at you wishful
but spiteful, cause if i had the option, i’d be like you
it’s painful, it’s wasteful, it hurts, i f-cking hate you
who are you to be content? while i’m over here
i’m breaking every mirror to ease the pain, so i never see what’s left
i look at you and hate you, now it even hurts to smile
every time i do it lets me know that it’s been gone a while
you could never live with this, every day it’s hit or miss
if you felt this pain a second, you would want to slit your wrist
and look at you, you’re clueless, you’re useless, it’s fruitless
root of all this agony and still you wanna do this, but

[hook]
why you gotta keep beating down on me?
let me breathe, if i gotta
get it right, i’mma do it, and it’s my life
all on me
let me breathe, i’m in the mirror like
why you gotta keep beating down on me?
’til i leave, if i gotta
get it right, i’mma do it, and it’s my life
all on me
all on me

[verse 2]
a complex is complex when taken out of context
add to that an ego and you still expected progress
i swear to god it’s like i got a cloud hanging over me
wanna tell somebody but it’s fear holding on to me
often taken like i’m arrogant and aloof
it’s embarr-ssing to hear, it’s like a mile from the truth
but when you’re placed amongst the sheep, sometimes you act like a wolf
and you can only lose the suit by stepping foot in the booth, i’ll tell ya

[hook]
why you gotta keep beating down on me?
’til i leave, if i gotta
get it right, i’mma do it, and it’s my life
all on me
all on me

[verse 3]
you think because we got a past that you deserve a p-ss?
i guess that only people close to you can hold you back
if you love ’em, let ’em go, that’s when emotions appear
you’re either holding onto tears or you’re holding onto years, what up

[verse 4]
does love always follow with depression?
cause i know that i’ve been told before but never learned my lesson
can’t get love if you don’t get real, don’t do drugs and you don’t pop pills
but is it really better being level headed instead of a better mind state on your own free will
god i feel all eyes on me, that don’t help, surprisingly
i learned sometimes it’s best to be the man your fam needs you to be
but a selfless act’s the start of demise
with every fake smile and laugh it means a part of you dies

- ethan bence lyrics

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