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i don't forget - erris lyrics

[sample: freya ridings]
old love, you’re breaking me up
burn, burning like the sun’

[verse]
b*tch i done fallen
b*tch i done fallen right down to an empty abyss
don’t know my pain ’til you listen to this
ponder in my head if you even have noticed
i been hurting for a minute i need you to notice (godd*mn)
aye, write all my songs through the f*cking sensation of pain
cloud over my head and it’s pouring down rain
would you even mourn if i blew out my brains?
think it’s bout time that i tell you bout something
cause holding this in is apart of my suffering
girl, all these chains and these cars don’t mean nothing
my n*gga, the kid wasn’t built for no stuntin’
i’m more about love, little naive
she was my air, need you to breathe
don’t give a d*mn, wear my heart on my sleeve
f*cked up my life by just watching you leave
it’s like you was blind to it all, and i couldn’t force you to see
i tried to treat you like a queen, but that ain’t who you wanna be
you were the menace in my life, you were disturbing my peace
see i had to work for your love, but our love wasn’t working for me
avoiding my pain over time as a year went by
remember dates under the night sky, it’s crazy just how much the time fly
my gut feeling got me nauseous
a void in my mind and i’m thoughtless
i know that my health is a process
but i just do not see no progress
cl!ck*clack, everybody better get back
big mac and a n*gga got a kick*back
time’s up, eyes shut, and it’s pitch black
one shot to the brain, i don’t miss that
wrote many letters just saying goodbye in the past ‘fore i faded to black
when it start to look like my life taking to steps ahead, i take another one back
miss my thrashers but i’m philly fly in a way
like a bird a n*gga be dreamin’ of flyin’ away
flyin’ away to make you think i’m dying today
not sure about death but still i tried anyway
demons rome through my f*ckin head trying to reach hope, but it’s the demons that f*ckin’ lie in the way
loss of motivation just to live in this b*tch, livin’ this sh*t is h*ll and i be shyin’ away
love is a b*tch and it’s making me ache
spiralin’, fallin’ apart, and i break
hope the demons go away when i pray
what can i say?
i don’t really wanna laugh, i don’t really wanna cry
i don’t really wanna live, i don’t really wanna die
i don’t know if i believe but i’m looking to the sky
i don’t really wanna sip but a n*gga gettin high, so
death in my head, poppin’ these pills for my sleep
my body a canvas, i’m ill*strating all my visions for n*ggas to see
slave to my mind, and i just still pray to be free
see the front that i put up is strong, but the heart that i’m bearing is weak
sick of n*ggas faking their depression, faking their anxiety
y’all do not know bout no pain, don’t know bout the demon that’s stirring inside of me
y’all do not know ’bout these meds that they force in my system, man what is sobriety?
see y’all just go beg for attention while all of my real ones, they sufferin’ silently
i was steady chasin’ after b*tches who was tryna break my heart but then i found out that it wasn’t in my purpose
‘stead i had to put it in a song to get this pain in these words and these thought and these lines in my verses
pray to the divine, fault in my design
obstacles, hurdles, all in my mind, am i worthless?
n*gga i been drownin’ in my sorrow in the motherf*cking deep and i’m really tryna stay above the surface
see i just been suffering mentally and meds do not serve as no remedy
a bunch of y’all stand as my enemies, i promise you won’t be the end of me
i spit my pain in every song all with a passion
i used to hide all of my baggage, man f*ck the maskin’
and i ain’t f*ckin’ with my ex because she past*tense
i’m cold hearted like the f*cking slopes in aspen
hollerin’ and screamin’, every evening, ain’t no f*ckin’ sleeping
ain’t no lucid dreamin’ and i’m pleading for a simple reason
don’t know what i’m thinkin’, heavy breathin’, family intervening
broken and i’m shattered into pieces, i ain’t never healing, uh
aye, these are my thoughts
listen my sorrow
in this life i can promise you pain
but i can’t even promise tomorrow
think it’s time to move on, man i ought to
thinking what it be like if i fought you
still picture when we f*ck in my thoughts too
then i lost you
that’s the type of d*mn regret that i’m brought to
feel like i don’t even got god here to talk to
see the trauma just flash and it thrash in my head
and the memories fade when you walk through
now i roam through this life as a loner, uh
but i still feel closer to closure, uh
the chip on shoulder’s a boulder, huh
switch up by the minute, bipolar, yuh
i ain’t poppin’ no pills in this b*tch, i gone sober
new freeze in this b*tch but somehow i get colder
i used to want clout and the fame but i’m older
i live through the rain in my brain ’til it’s over
[outro]
i know i seem full of regret, but trust me i do not forget
(kingpin, king*)
i know i seem full of regret, but trust me i do not forget

- erris lyrics

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