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master chief vs leonidas - epic rap battles of history lyrics

epic rap battles of history!
master chief vs leonidas!
begin!

[leonidas]
spartans, let’s start this
show this petty officer who’s the hardest
the biggest mistake that you’ve ever made
i’ll toss you like a frag grenade
i’ll stomp you in the face with my sandals, enraged
and tonight we shall rhyme in the shade
your puny fans are fat nerds on computers,
jerking off to games, giving themselves first-person shooters.
your armor’s hard, but my abs are harder,
you’re in my hood now, chief, this is sparta!

[master chief]
not so fast
cortana says you’re greek
so why don’t you stick these lyrics up your -ss
they built a monument to my sins
you’re the soldier they need you to be
ain’t no way that you can beat me
even my initials spell m.c
while you and your companions were all camping in a canyon
took a campaign to your house and showed your queen my plasma cannon
they shoulda thrown your rhymes over the cliff because they’re sickly
you will not enjoy this, but it will be over quickly

[leonidas]
ha! i’ve had better battles with my six-year-old son
i don’t need firepower when i’m rockin these guns
i’m king, you sleep in a freezer in outer sp-ce
i’d look you in the eyes, but you’re too much of a b-tch to show your face!

[master chief]
you’ve got a bad case of no shirt there, fabio flintstone.
your whole plan got messed up by a hunchback with down syndrome
300 -sses needed kicking, give more teabags than lipton
so why don’t you quit your b-tching, my trigger finger’s itching

who won? who’s next? you decide!
epic rap battles of history!

- epic rap battles of history lyrics

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