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mordecai vs twilight sparkle 2 - epic rap battles of cartoons lyrics

[intro]
epic rap battles of cartoons
twilight sparkle
versus
mordecai
2
begin!

[verse 1: mordecai]
oh, f*ck no! i have to go through this piece of sh*t again?
even worse, you are a ruler, and that’ll be a sin
you now have wings? looks like i have to cut your wings off too
and turn you into burger meat, you miserable pile of splooge
i’m mordecai, you will die, you brainwashed guys
for them to buy stupid sh*t that’s super hard to find
celestia made you a princess because she was doing cocaine
forgetting lesson zero makes you f*cking insane
i’ll rip off your h*rn and shove it up your cranky doodle donkey!
it’s not ponyville, it’s the world of c*nty
good news for me; you’ll bе f*cking disappointed
me and margaret kissеd, now we are in a relationship
i am the champion, you are a f*cking failure
you are not a hero, i saved eileen from the death bear
princess twilight sparkle, your rhymes are f*cking sour
now get down on your knees and suck the power!!!
[verse 2: twilight sparkle]
dear princess celestia: tell this bird to p*ss off
this person is cheaper than a cupcake shop
i don’t even get why people ship us, are they stupid?
oh well! at least i have wings like a valentine’s day cupid
me and shining armor won part 1, so i’ll win part 2
h*ll, even derpy hooves is more smarter than you!
what’s the matter, diaper boy? you wanna ca*caw on margaret?
dude time on you, it makes me puking
you couldn’t even get a handshake from margaret’s dad
he made you wear a yellow speedo, and that was really bad
you’re in a relationship with margaret? how much did you pay her?
i’m a princess, what are you? a prune purse?
are you even considered a badass? cause you are really not
you think you’re really cool cause you’re smoking pot?
i did this all in round 1, we’ll do it again today
applejack calls you hay, that’s why she says “time to hit the hay”!

[verse 3: mordecai]
that’s bullsh*t, you c*nt! you smell like f*cking skeet
your show’s like the best vhs in the world, you lied to me
i’m a party animal, you’re just a plain animal
i’m in a video game, you’re game is about you teaching education
i’ll make your brain explode into a million pieces
want a refreshing mordeshake that’s stirred with my p*n*s?
i’m gonna rap it up, so here’s my final line:
i’m sad that you are a princess cause you won’t die!!!
[verse 4: twilight sparkle]
i’m a human now, so please stop your complaining
your rap style is worse than when rarity was handling rain
i defeated sunset shimmer, and now i’ll defeat you
every time you get rejected, you’ll always turn blue
i saved everybody’s lives, you only saved 1
your love is not in bloom, you don’t even have love!
spike, take this important message down for celestia
i learned something today: blue jays suck!

[outro]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide!
epic rap battles of cartoons! season 2!

- epic rap battles of cartoons lyrics

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