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vladimir putin vs volodomyr zelenskyy (uncensored version) - epic rap batles lyrics

[interlude: vladimir putin]
zelenskyy, i give you one final offer
one more battle, heaven vs h*ll
if you lose, then you will burn like the rest of us

[intro]
epic rap batles of history!
vladimir putin
vs
volodomyr zelsnkyy
begin!

[verse 1: vladimir putin]
i enter this battle like a plague upon the land
you’re a sad sore loser, always needing a hand
i talked to olena and you know that i filled her
‘cause me and my guerrillas are a squad of k!llers (woo, woo)
this man’s comedian? (ha) what a joke
here have some of my poison, just be careful don’t choke
it’s best you surrender now, it’s your spirit i’m lowerin’
i took a look at your country and took a sh*t all over it

[verse 2: volodymyr zelensky]
go back to the west’s shadow kid, you’re all talk
you like to run your tanks but you can’t walk the walk
i’ll beat this real life thanos and we’ll avenge in this fight
your economy dying? i’ve seen it. it’s a pretty sight
you and your wagner group can go slobber on my палка
i might be a comedian but you are the biggest clown, sir
you hate on the g*ys but we all know you’re the biggest f*g
russia’s going down, b*tch, why did you f*cking attacked?
[verse 3: vladimir putin]
i got a tumor in my head, but at least i get more head
a few years ago, you went up to that piano and said
“shrock! i’mma whip you with my c*ck
when it hits you in the face, it’s as hard as a rock!”

[verse 2: volodymyr zelensky and joe biden]
i told you to back off c*nt and you didn’t listen
now to beat you, easily every nation’s mission
time for my final line, so let’s make this the best
come and finish this joe
h*ll yea brother, here we go

[verse 5: joe biden and emmanuel macron]
biden here, about to rock the boat!
if i can beat an orange then i can beat you chodes
we all know putin’s a brony, he’s a f*cking horse lover
he likes to see a uni cornpop a nut in another (hon, hon, hon)
while america’s packing a six pack and big guns
big fun. unlike russians i can have fun in the sun
when you invaded, your men ran from your stupid ass
i’ll boom headshot on your face, it’ll be a blast

[interlude: vladimir putin and alexander lukashenko]
you got to bring in a friend? then i do too
lukashenko?
it’ll be my pleasure, comrade putin
[verse 6: alexander lukashenko]
дa, you want to mess with me?
a well renowned figure on russian tv!
i’m putin’s best friend, there ain’t no one greater
while zelensky’s a dictator, if you take out the tator
always asking for money, get a job you dweebs
or risk getting served by russia’s wmds
we’ll send the world under flames when we pull the switch
call me jon snow, winter is coming b*tch, b*tch, b*tch, b*tch, b*tch

[interlude: xi jiping]
ha, ha, ha, you’re messing with the wrong country now

[verse 7: xi jinping]
i’m xi jiping, leader of the east
ain’t no one in the world can compete with my beast (doubletime)
putin, you’re just a wannabe king
trying to relive the past, but your grip is slipping
biden, you talk big, but your actions fall flat
your presidency’s weak, like a flimsy doormat
zelensky, you’re a comedian, a joke in this game
your policies are soft, and you’re not fit for fame
lukashenko, you’re a dictator, a relic of the past
you can try to silence your people, but your power won’t last
so step aside, and let the real leader take charge
i’m the one in control, my rule is large
china’s on the rise, and the world will see
i’m xi jinping, and i’m the one to beat
[outro]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide!
epic! aaahh rap batles of history!

- epic rap batles lyrics

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