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brian griffin vs. bandit heeler - epic rap batles lyrics

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[intro: the announcer]
epic rap batles of history!
brian griffin
vs
bandit heeler
begin!

[verse 1: brian griffin]
my name is brian griffin. i’m a leftist author
i have a famous son, you have some autistic daughters
i gave chilli my dog and you can say now i’m her hubby
why did you put your “sticky gecko” into wendy’s “cubby”?
i might be a “family guy” but i gotta know
why did they put adult references inside of a kids show?
like death, miscarriage and infertility
adhd, french people and ptsd
you fatty, quit eating weiners or it’ll be your end
are there snakes in the outback? call me a diamondback, friend
calm down, you skippy poofter, you’re getting too p*ssed
you’re only an archeologist if you takе out the logist

[verse 2: bandit heeler and bluey]
bluey, get mе a fackin’ pack of stubbies
my kids watch you on shorts while they’re sitting on the dunny
you always tryna pipe some white chicks but you be
getting mad cause your b*lls get (da*da*da*da*da*da*da, bluey!)
when they ran your ass over i thought it was crass
then i filmed myself throwing your dvds in the trash
you ripped off “the simpsons” god d*mn, that’s criminal
you shouldn’t be mad because i’m the aboriginal
i’m from the land down under you’re b*tthurt you see
i’ll neuter your b*lls so you can’t play “keepy uppy”
i met with lois griffin. that b*tch was trippin’
she “chattermax’d” my “floppy bunny” ‘till i busted in ‘em
life of brian? more like a mid*life brian
you’re an icon in ruin, you’re better off joining isis
you had s*x with quagmire’s dad are you h0m*
now b*gg*r off you drongo i’m on fackin’ smoko
[verse 3: brian griffin]
while you were busy rapping i went and plowed your nanna
your show is even worse than bananas in pyjamas
so before you come to battle with an actual intellectual
bandit heeler, you’re just a p*ssy whose brothers are h0m*s*xual

[verse 4: bandit heeler]
oh will you shut the f*ck up, you leftist c*nt
at least i didn’t tell a guy about p*n*ses i sucked
drinking pawtucket beer and martinis
ditch that fackin’ sh*t and pick up some fackin’ vbs

[verse 5: brian griffin]
you’re a r*t*rded banana bender, no class to be found
we should call herbert the pervert with all those children around
you called your daughter ***, what are you, a racist?
that dance mode bluey album wasn’t in my playlist
give me some “sp*ce” you “sheepdog”, your family’s a bunch of “fairies”
call me “unicorse”, buddy. because why should i caresies?
i’ll go on a “curry quest” so i can “bbq” your f*nny
when i see you i vomit harder than when i see grannies

[verse 6: bandit heeler and bluey]
when i see my wife chilli i get a pretty big b*n*r
everyone knows you’re just seth macfarlane’s fursona
stupid c*nt dog. sit, roll over, shake and beg
my kids are a handful but at least they aren’t meg
this is the end for you griffins, you shouldn’t have made me do this
remember not to mess with chilli, bingo, bandit and bluey
[verse 7: bandit heeler, brian griffin, and the announcer]
why are we fighting anyways? there’s no reason
can we both stop it, i mean, we’re both decent
i don’t know why either, i mean, it makes me sad
like, let’s be honest, we’re both hot cartoon dads
i mean, you have a good series, uhh, you do too
i guess no other dad will be hotter than you
so can we be friends? there’s no way to deny
coming soon, a crossover between bluey and family guy

[outro: the announcer]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide
epic rap batles of history

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