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monika vs quagmire - epic rap batles of history lyrics

[intro: monika]
epic rap batles of history!
glenn quagmire
vs
yours truly… *chuckles*
begin!

[verse 1: glenn quagmire]
mascot horror took a turn after slender man, woof
you told young girls to k!ll themselves and then said it was a goof
if your pink*haired friend needs a new daddy then she’s lucky
now it’s time i find out why they call her nutsucky
(ay) you like trapping people in a room for infinity
(ay) at least i let the girls go eventually, just giggity
(ay) your game might have been free but i still felt ripped
i heard your club had yuri, but none of the girls stripped!

[verse 2: monika]
who the f*ck starts a batle like that? on sight
your giggity bits are hit*or*miss, all right
as the club president, i mic*control the prompts (heheh)
i spit with such flow, no wondеr quagmire’s swamped
(ay) tom sellеck called, (ay) he wants his shirt back
so get it off your s*xy chest and tell me you can flirt back
(ay) and i’ll keep it true
it seems today, that all you see, is a future where i can be with you
[verse 3: glenn quagmire]
i tried to delete your file, but i must have been in stupor
’cause i got distracted by other folders in my computer
look, i may be kinda sleazy, but your vibe is just the worst
but i’ll be knocking on your door like “18? you’re first.”
ddlc’s a gross, exploitative disgrace
you bunch of hopeless, lowercase poets; aliza grace (oh!)
turn mental illness into punchlines, edgy shocks, and gore
and i could forgive all of it if you weren’t such a bore

[verse 4: monika]
in every other cutaway, you got the charges piling
quahog, rhode island? more like flight crash, lone island
and i heard you flew the plane, this pervert can’t be helped
so why don’t you erotically asphyxiate yourself? (ohh)
don’t go mano*a*monika, your doki*doki will go offline
you have more sti’s than inches in your jawline
now this s*xual offender is the one getting abducted
don’t need to go into the code, this *phile came corrupted

[outro: monika]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide
epic rap… batles* oops… *nervous laughter* of history

- epic rap batles of history lyrics

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