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leif eriksson vs christopher columbus - epic fanmade rap battles of history lyrics

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[verse 1: leif eriksson]
oh, what do we have here? oh right, christopher columbus
with your long nose and ugly face, you’ll never get french*kissed!
or italian*kissed, or wherever the h*ll you’re from
anyone who thinks you discovered america is obviously dumb!
nice try, but i got here 400 years before ya!
and the only reason you got here is because isabella seems to adore ya’!
now i understand it’s hard to teach kids about vikings, but you gotta tell them the truth!
saying you discovеred america is like saying i k!llеd john wilkes booth!

[verse 2: christopher columbus]
what are you gonna do? time travel and try to change kid’s minds?
or change the words on there homework they’ve sadly been assigned?
yeah, i don’t think so, you’ll never get recognition!
i mean, you could have at least enslaved some people on your expedition!
you’re “leif the lucky” eh? well the luck stops here!
you’re just viking scum, i’m on a much higher tier!
what is this “vinland” you speak of? it isn’t on my map
i guess those 400 years makes a difference, chap!

[verse 3: leif eriksson]
i died, went to valhalla, you died you went to h*ll!
’cause you enslaved a bunch of innocent tainos and tortured them as well!
i mean, how could anyone call you a hero?
you’re almost a badder person than emperor nero!
[verse 4: christopher columbus]
woah man, isn’t that a bit harsh?
on second thought, i could just kick your ass from genoa to marsh
think you can hurt me? oh please, don’t chaff
you may have had the first landing, but i get the last laugh!

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