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never go walking without your hat pin - elsa lanchester lyrics

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my granny was a very shrewd old lady
the smartest woman that i ever met
she used to say, “now listen to me, sadie
there’s one thing that you never must forget:”

“never go walking out without your hat pin
the law won’t let you carry more than that
for if you go walking out without your hat pin
you may lose your head as well as lose your hat!”

my granny said men never could be trusted
no matter how refined they might appear
she said that many maidens’ hearts got busted
becausе men never had but onе idea

i’ve heard that grandpa really was a mess
so grandma knew whereof she spoke, i guess

never go walking out without your hat pin
not even to some very classy joints
for when a fellow sees you’ve got a hat pin
he’s very much more apt to get the point

my mama, too, set quite a bad example
she never heeded grandmama’s advice
she found that if you give a man a sample
the sample somehow never does suffice
in fact, it’s rumored i might not have been
if mum had not gone out without her pin

never go walking out without your hat pin
it’s about the best protection you have got
for if you go walking out without your hat pin
you may come home without your you*know*what!

- elsa lanchester lyrics

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