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reality check - e-lustre lyrics

time is everything, time is everything
time is everything i need
time is everything, time is everything
time heals everything

i’m coming close to doubt it
i hold too many grudges
d-mn it’s getting exhausting
wow they burden me badly
and despite fragile knees how do i keep standing?
i’m way too discreet with all my stories
i should let the personal sh-t get involved with the music
this music at the end of the day is everything holding on to me
the only i still own yet
when a door closes a window’s opened
door closed a window’s opened
there goes my favorite proverb
less woes especially in moments

moments of anguish and pain
till you shut the door in my face
i knock the door, ring the bell
it’s evident you don’t care, wait
okay i’ll go away
okay i see you changed
searching for that window
down here these days’s been
have neither seen light in a while
like i moved to the bas-m-nt
wailing amongst hatred appalling all chain breakers
i apologize in advance and advance if i don’t make it

tell her i’ve been put to the test
godd-mn it wasn’t nice
i know how it feels to have someone holding a gun to your head
wow baby i could’ve died
or maybe i’m never in danger at all
cause i feel someone’s watching my step from above
even i always thought
i’d panic frightened to leave this world
how ironic that
yeah i was wrong
you won’t ever know till it happens to you
fear doesn’t mean sh-t
nah it doesn’t mean sh-t when you got nothing to lose?
crazy, ain’t it?
i’ve been witnessing god testing me lately
letting n-body tell me i ain’t keep my faith strong
didn’t i keep my faith?
cause a couple months ago i got left by la fe
that sh-t affected me like nothing before
along this way
so go away
yeah go away
just go away
ignorance is bliss
no grief is able to sink (please tell)
how easy it turns to leave
when you don’t see what you damage
how much ravage i be able manage
as if that wouldn’t have been enough

my reckless behaviour took a toll on me
on me cause later on i got
i got jumped by some fools
guess that’s the 2nd disgrace
and i truly am a good boy
no i ain’t here to front
but i ain’t the type to hold back
boy i got my revenge
named leonardo hence i feel like a lion
fighting big cats but i am trapped in my own jungle
walking downtown like there ain’t no one i can’t face though
2 scars my face show, and i do not regret none
got no regrets though
they’re nothing compared to
they’re nothing compared
to the sore in my mental

eversince you left i dress in black
i attend my own funeral
love i gotta bury alive
i attend my own funeral
i gotta bury alive
all love and affection
i confess once in awhile, i lose desire for life
and a mad choices turn into mad tentation
myself i question, about this life being not worth
it really doesn’t matter cause ain’t nowhere to jump from
cause all my bridges burned down
this might just be my downfall
i ask for strength from above
porque no es la solución
algunos vienen y otros van
lo sé y no sé como aceptar
hurts deep in my chest
a heart beats nonetheless
at home alone in tears dissolved
nothing fills me but emptiness but f-ck it
you know
my father taught me to keep it macho so i won’t
no i won’t tell i’m depressed
not even admit to myself
jag vet att du vill mig förstörd
but i swear, i swear to god
i swear i’ll come back from h-ll

for real you keep playing games of accusation and judgment
yet far too late from the happening
me, i tell it right away, no i wouldn’t wait
i wouldn’t wait for months after mistakes done
no way
to put the blame on you
no no way to blame you when i already forgave you
i saw my trust and love betrayed
slowly turn into rancor
frankly i go to bed afraid of these nightmares i’m aware
i am forced even bound to
k!ll myself to wake up from
flashbacks to the person who’s gone
promising things that were never fulfilled
answer me, was is it ever true love?
i question the lord
why’d you put someone like that on my road?
to grow within me and then dissappear?
perhaps that is your will
just remember this ain’t the fate i prayed to god for
waging wars you sent me but i wasn’t designed for

so rarely i close my eyes i try not
to fall asleep at night cause if i do
i take the risk you might show
up in my dreams, start telling me things like
“things gon’ be alright though”
and h-ll no! nothing is alright
it’s a dangerous inferno
the night i close my eyes, yet
happens every night slept
my dreams come to a mad end
then i get
reality checked
i’m reminded nowadays
i am by myself

- e lustre lyrics

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