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big boy baller - dj bong4adick lyrics

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[intro]
so, people have said to me recently, “uh, eli, if you’re trying to be in the rap game, you gotta be hard. uh, right now you’re about as hard as one of those little koosh b-lls.” and i said, “…what?”, and they said, “you’re also bad at sports.”
and i said, “now that’s where i gotta disagree. you know why?”

[hook]
cuz i’m a big boy baller
couldn’t get taller
wear t-shirts in the fall-er
reach never gettin’ smaller
yeah, your broad’s tryna holler
know that i just wall her
likes my turtleneck collar
but i won’t call her
cuz i’m a bro
and i’m a big boy baller (kick it)

[verse 1]
you know i’m hard and i’m igneous
redundant and ridiculous
morty and rickulous
my woman should be thick-ulous
my rhymes are meticulous
but not thought out, like how i hit baseb-lls
in regard to the park
that’s enough of that arc, let’s go back to the main part

[hook]
cuz i’m a big boy baller
i give it my all-er
decline every caller
i’m sicker than y’all-er
catch me chillin’ at the mall-er
that’s how i spend my dollar
i’m happy and i’m joll-er
i’m a big boy baller

[verse 2]
so this young–ss broad
she came and said to me
“dj bong4ad-ck how is your rhythm so free?”
stuck out my hand, touched her knee
i said i steal it from a guy that’s much better than me

[hook]
cuz i’m a big boy baller
come give me a holler
unteer to the vol-ler
i center with my callers
if i ever do fall-er
don’t worry, baller
i can handle my sh-t
cuz i’m a big boy baller

[verse 3]
i fight three guys at one time
call me chiquita, organized crime
air-hump all day like a s-xual mime
i will dominate you, all of it’s mine
ain’t an old fruit, cuz i never wine
like world of warcraft, i always grind
if you tryna f-ck with me, i don’t mind
cuz i’m a big boy baller and i’m one of a kind
i’m the kind of fella females often pine
all the girls ’round here are like fishing line
what i mean by that is that they’re all so fine
so a big boy baller makes a bad b-tch mine

[outro]
yeah, baby
i’m a big boy baller
couldn’t get taller
wear t-shirts in the fall-er
reach never getting smaller
if you wanna fight me, please just don’t
cuz i’m a small boy baller and this song is a joke

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