became who i wasn’t - desolation lyrics
[verse 1: komato$e]
“who are you?” i whispered meekly to the mirror
“i’m you” it said, but fearless, “i want to see you clearer”
i could only utter the smallest of gasps
‘cause i‘m having deja vu, i swear this happened in the past
but at last, the mirror continued to confront me
not angrily, but softly, we started to discuss me
“you’re working yourself too hard, not smart enough
and you’re always pessimistic, karma isn’t fun”
i comprehended that the substance running through me
did contribute to this moment, but i knew it helped my blooming
never ever stopped consuming any lasting bit of knowledge
after that moment hit, ‘cause i turned into a problem
for myself & others in my life that were important
i sat there for a minute & with minimal distortion
i looked up & said “i love you, i no longer fear you
we fear what we hate the most, but now i’ve got a clear view”
and the f-cked up part is i never opened my lips
my friends were looking for me, so i finally did get dismissed
[verse 2: desolation]
and as i sit in my room in silence / tears all upon my face
feeling misplaced like i’m not who i really am
i’m not who i was yeah that’s for sure / but latley i don’t know
which way should i go? who should i be?
i ask these questions but its all on me
as i look in the mirror / i tend to glance the other way
ashamed and scared that i’ll be forgotten / a soul half rotted
and torn away / just a walking body of my own mistakes
of my own heart breaks / if i’m ever to be anyone better
i just hope, i hope, i’m who i really am and not…
who i’m not
i swear i’m not… who i’m not
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