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grayscale dreams - deerxing lyrics

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in retrospect, i’ve gleaned
you were exactly how you seemed
but i ignored a lot of things
the times you were inviting me
betrayed an inconsistency
i’d consciously adjust
deliberately trust
and write it off as structuring your days
around disruptive things i knew
and couldn’t envy

and i find, when i waste time
i try to convince myself
it was worthwhile
but i find, with you and i
that i was a waste of your time
and you were a waste of mine

and in those little grayscale dreams
at the tail*ends of sleep
i maybe kick your ass or kick your face
but since i’m half*awake in them
i guess that i should take
a little credit for their taking place
and deeper down i’ve dreamt
that there’s a section of arendt
with all these easy*to*p*rs* diagrams
and it makes sense that you’d recommend
a book i only comprehend in dreams
’cause you’re impossible to understand
and i find, when i waste time
i try to convince myself
it was worthwhile
but i find, with you and i
that i was a waste of your time
and you were a waste of mine

and they call costly vices finer things
and you have yours
whiskey and infidelity
i think i’ll stick with trust and trading cards
but i’ve had my fill of complacency

and i find, when i waste time
i try to convince myself
it was worthwhile
but i find, with you and i
that i was a waste of your time
and you were a waste of mine
when i wrote ‘how many times’
i was blind to what i would know
in two weeks’ time
so i fear, with you, my dear
that you were a waste of my year

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