one big pickle - deborah healy lyrics
[verse 1]
i’m free, motherf-ckers
no prison can hold me motherf-ckers
now i can be who i want to be
but first, i really have to pee
the cops will never stop hunting
but maybe that’s a fun thing
[verse 2]
stress keeps a v-g-n- moist, and that concludes my point
thank you for coming to my ted talk
i think i’m going to die at 12 o’ clock
i can hear the sirens start to approach
maybe i’ll pretend to be a roach
[pre-chorus 1]
i’m caught in a pickle
and i don’t mean michael’s d-ck
[chorus]
i can’t go back to jail
everyone in there looks like a whale
i’m too skinny to be illegal
you better stay back, ’cause this p-ssy is lethal
[verse 2]
while i was locked up, i met two beautiful women named grendel and muriel
they taught me how to make love on a concrete floor
and in return i taught them how to be a wh-r-
and in the night, i had a fright t
that i’d be alone forever, m-ssaging my old woman p-ssy
i couldn’t ask for anything better
[pre-chorus 2]
oh sh-t here they come
i’m in a real pickle
and i don’t mean michael’s d-ckle
[chorus]
i can’t go back to jail
everyone in there looks like a whale
i’m too skinny to be illegal
you better stay back, ’cause this p-ssy is lethal
leave me alone or i’ll do something crazy
like [unintelligible] a defenseless baby
let’s play a game, you should all be f-cking ashamed
i’m not a threat to children’s safety
[bridge]
deborah, you’re f-cking under arrest again
no
what do you mean “no”?
stay back or i’ll f-cking blow the local orphanage to smithereens
nice try, deborah, we don’t even have a local orphana-
[innocent children screaming in pain and dying]
what the f-ck just happened?
i just blew the local orphanage to smithereens
[chorus]
i can’t go back to jail
everyone in there looks like a whale
i’m too skinny to be illegal
you better stay back, ’cause this p-ssy is lethal
leave me alone or i’ll do something crazy
like [unintelligible] a defenseless baby
let’s play a game, you should all be f-cking ashamed
i’m not a threat to children’s safety
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