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the end (redux) - dead/awake lyrics

buckle under the weight of my soul
succumb to things that i can’t control
falling apart slowly at the seams
deaf ears are listening to my screams
everything seems to have lost its feel
losing grip of what i thought was real
can’t remember when i felt alive
this feeling is so d*mn hard to describe
no matter how f*cking hard i try
i feel dead inside where i lie
awake at night trapped in my own head
grab the gun and prepare for the end

it took me decades but now i see
that the world has nothing left that it can offer mе
i beg for death
i need to find my peacе
i take my last breath
i envy the deceased

grab the pistol from my dresser drawer
tears are falling, i get on the floor
make sure that i locked the bedroom door
note that says i can’t take any more
shake as my hand slowly feels the steel
thoughts of how my family will feel
know that i have so much left to do
thoughts of perspective are coming through
lay the pistol down at my side
tired of finding ways i can hide
deciding now i don’t want to run
someday i swear i will see the sun
i won’t let it take me
i won’t let it take me
i won’t let it take me
i won’t let it take me

- deadawake lyrics

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