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long gone - darian rodriguez lyrics

[chorus]
long gone are the days when it was cool
to be vicious
it was cool
to be wicked
unashamed
long gone are the days
when tools
like disappointment
were used
like poison
playing games

[verse 1]
i grapple with the memories
they come and go like flashes
every time i try to speak
i’m overwhelmed by madness
he tells me that secrets are all i should keep
and my mind is so worthless that i shouldn’t speak
i made mistakes
but that is not the crime
it’s still my head on the pillow when it’s bedtime
if i post up your address
will you even get a fine?
a slap on the wrist, another girl gone wild
the only way that i can heal is if i speak about it
but if i’m talking to the silence then my voice is shrouded
it’s crowded all the time
integrity doubted
if god’s supposed to heal then why he being slow about it

[chorus]
long gone …

[verse 2]
my body remembers, it rewinds without me
i prayed all about it
that healing set me free
i ask you if you are going through the same thing
find someone around to to share without shame
if you don’t speak now
you’ll drown in the pain

[chorus]
long gone …

[verse 3]
first step in healing
is learning your feelings
are god’s gift to you
to see without seeing
so trust in your spirit
reject what’s demeaning
hearing you pray makes demons run screaming

the reason they’ve been scheming
is you’ve always been appealing
before all the beating
your mirror was feeding
from evenings of grieving
teeming with squeezing
the regret that you’re keeping
is not what you’re needing

deep breath for your breathing
and speaking what i’m teaching
leaving is revealing that preceding all the preaching
you felt something was wrong
and that’s all it takes

[chorus]
long gone…

[freestyle]
it all started out so cute
someone to talk to when you were feelin’ alone
held him at the other end of your phone
but now he puts you in his pocket
like you are his pet
taught you real well not to speak up when you’re feeling upset
so when your mama called the other day to ask, “why haven’t i met your boyfriend yet?”
you didn’t have the guts to tell her that bruises are hard to forget
and your friends ask, “where you been lately?”
why you so shaky? why you talking so crazy?
we get it: life’s hard, but you got it good, baby
you found yourself a man that loves you more than my rent is worth
so eat the dirt, be his
we know it hurts
but we out here hustlin’ and grindin’ just to pay the bills
he’s takin’ you out to fancy meals
just cuz you got a pretty face

- darian rodriguez lyrics

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