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when you stretch the truth for a song - daniel thrasher lyrics

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daniel
hey man, did you see my wallet laying around anywhere?

hoodie guy:
daniel can’t find his money
he don’t know where it is
i think it’s a little bit funny
just how sad of a life
this poor boy lives

he is lost
and he’s afraid
no, i’m not
he’s never felt so alone
in this whirlwind he calls home

i need my wallet, please

his rage is burning brightly
it’s buried deep within
his flesh is barely human
it’s a cybertronic skin
what?

rippling robot muscles
could take down dinosaurs
but speaking of extenction
here comes a meteor
oh, wow
with jetpack cyborg boosters
he flies across the sea
he launches high into the sky
to save both you and me
dude*

the meteor aproaches
the asteroid is here
the people of earth tremble
they cower in their fear

but cyborg daniel races
he laughs in danger’s face (ha ha!)
as mother nature’s biggest threat
is hurled from outer sp*ce

the meteor then shapeshifts
into a cosmic hurdle
an adolescent, omnipresent
mutant chaos turtle
(you know what i’m saying?
no, i don’t.)

and now our mecha*daniel
takes on this mega beast
he slices him and dices him
and makes a turtle feast (yum)
the creature shrieks in horror
yet.. doesn’t make a sound
for if you know astronomy
no soundwaves can be found
(sp*ce is a vacuum)

and s*xy robot daniel™
he lands on earth once more
his motherland protected
now stronger than before

the people all adore him
they worship this machine
the pope blessed him, anointed…
he’s been knighted by the queen…

wow. that was a good sta*

turns out the queen’s an alien (oh my god.)
and she has laser eyes
she tricked the whole entire world
in wrinkly disguise

- daniel thrasher lyrics

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