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heaven in america - dane bachman lyrics

[verse 1]
it’s been a little too long since i wrote many songs, and correct me if i’m wrong but my toys are all gone; they’re in heaven
so i’ll find new games that a grown man can play while my country decays as i slowly turn grey; this ain’t heaven
once it was cool to wanna die, to chug rum as i cried, but now i can’t lie, i’m too old to run and hide; that’s in heaven
and when i eat really well i feel really swell, or maybe when i feel swell i eat really well; i’ll be in heaven

[verse 2]
i’ll never know just how i’m gonna go, i might make a tasteless joke and wake up down below, not in heaven
one day i’ll be flowers, it’s getting closer by the hour, on the american tower i’m clawing for power, then it’s heaven
so c-ck me a gun and raise me a son, i’ll never be done until judgement day comes before heaven
i’ll read me a bible, secure my survival, live in denial until my arrival in heaven

[chorus]
i’m just another in a cesspool of others today
controlling my brothers while begging my lovers to stay
born and grew up and put up with enough just to say
bow down beneath me, i pray god release me, christ’s sake

[bridge; spoken]
and the lord said ‘let there be light,’ and there was. the lord sacrificed his son, jesus christ, so that you could all be forgiven of your original sin, so you could have some room to sin some more. so you could live a life of amenities, of religious and spiritual joy, of snapchat streaks, of the whip and the nae nae, of buzzfeed and cnn and fox news and all of god’s other children. and now, for a reciting of the new and improved ten commandments:
commandment one: thou shall not offend
commandment two: thou shall not mansplain
commandment three: thou shall not have to pay for thine own college– god is there for that
commandment four: thou shall not read
commandment five: thou shall not covet any wives
commandment six: thou shall always have the latest model of iphone
commandment seven: thou shall not eat foods containing gmos, msg, sugar, gluten, meat, or pesticides
commandment eight: thou shall not be white, heterosexual, and a man all at once, oh no
commandment nine: thou shall never use the same vape twice
commandment ten: thou shall not question or doubt any of the previous commandments or else not only will thou go to hell but thou will also face serious legal repercussions
oh boy, call me a born sinner, as i do believe i’ve broken not one, not two, but all of these commandments! ahh, forgive me father, i have sinned greatly! forgive me, forgive me!

- dane bachman lyrics

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