tard wrangler - custodian lyrics
[intro: custodian]
i’ve been dealing with these students for so long now
and i don’t know what to do
they pull my hair
they call me names
and they just don’t know any better
i don’t know what to do anymore
can somebody please help me?
please i can’t do this by myself
please
[verse 1: custodian]
if you need some help controlling your kids
i know how they are yeah i know how it is
if your kids make you mad
fill you with anger
you gotta call me
i’m the tard wrangler
you can beat ’em
anything that’s not lethal
‘cuz when you’re a wrangler it’s all legal
if you’re gonna treat em like a dog, make sure it’s a beagle
lock them up outside ‘cuz you know they’re not equal
[interlude: custodian]
hey man that was a little f-cked up
my kid’s just been acting up recently
and i wanna make sure that he’s taken care of
because i just can’t do it by myself
and i just- i know that you’re a professional
that’s why i came to you first
like i know that you sometime have to deal with kids who are a little over the top
and i understand that completely
but this is my kid that we’re talking about
i don’t want you to just randomly-
i don’t want you to just hurt him
oh he’s coming now
i’ll let you have a word with him
uh hey kid
hey kid?
hey kid!
[verse 2: pepconzza & custodian]
if you didn’t know school sucks
it’s g-y
everybody in the world they’re stupid like hey (what?)
every teacher don’t know what they’re doing
they are so dumb
why do they sound like they’re eating bum? (what? what the f-ck are you talking about?)
did you know kai?
he’s a f-ggot
hey
oh my god bro you is dumb (yo, keep it clean now)
looking like your girl use to eat my bum
but no
‘cuz i ain’t that g-y
looking at gervontay i’m like no way (don’t call people g-y)
get a real life did you know you’re g-y
everybody in this world is so f-cking stupid
might as well call ’em kolton (hey don’t talk sh-t about kolton man)
did you know you is a f-cking buddhist
oh my god
it’s sh-t man
did you know his name is zeth? (hey don’t call him sh-t man)
d-mn
oh my god dude i like to twirl
just kidding ‘cuz andrew twirls and says p-n-s
call him a g-y f-g and i know he’s a freakest (freakest?)
freakist
is that that word (no it’s not a word, uriah)
that no one cares ‘cuz you know you’re a girl
but sometime girls ain’t that bad, no
but unless you’re a tranny
i’m like h-ll no (don’t talk sh-t about trannys man)
trannys p-ss me off
if you’re g-y that’s okay
but you can’t turn yourself inside out that’s weird (trannys are people too)
you might as well get rid of yourself off this earth
you queer (you shouldn’t tell people to k!ll themself)
i don’t smoke i don’t really care
but you know i don’t support those trans
i’ll support g-ys
everybody else are lez (what the f-ck are you talking about i just came here to talk to you)
i don’t care
as long as you’re not trans i don’t care
hey
school’s so broken i don’t love it (the school isn’t boken, it’s people like you who break it)
girls are broken you know they’re f-cking
all the girls in the school hang with all the r-t-rds
oh you (it’s kind of ironic you’re calling people r-t-rds)
almost all the guys
are funny but they’re high
outta their f-cking mind (who’s doing drugs on school campus)
but i know you is blind
but i’m blinding you with these g-y bars
you know you a fruit ah (blinding us what the f-ck? you’re one to talk about being blind)
nolan’s an albino he’s dumb (f-cking albino what the f-ck?)
[outro: custodian]
what the f-ck are you talking about, uriah
man you’re on some f-cking other sh-t, man
like you said some pretty harsh stuff about
g-ys, and trannys
and more g-ys and more trannys
and you said some mean stuff about your fellow tards
who i have personally worked with and corrected them
but i don’t think i can really correct you
without going into further discipline
i’m going to have to go to a last resort
and i’m sorry uriah but this is your last f-cking warning
no you’ve had your warnings
right now get out of my sight and go down to mr. larry’s office, right now
no question you’re going to mr. larry’s office right now
go tell him that i sent you down here
say you were disobeying the tard wrangler
say you were talking sh-t about trannys
say you were talking sh-t about all the other kids
‘cuz you’re going to mr. larry’s office right f-cking now
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