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real art - crudbump lyrics

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i walked up to the building
knocked on the window, secretary drew the blinds slow
let me in, i got something important
heard her yell back to the back, hey do you know him

the door buzzed and i pulled it open
took out my briefcase, the guard said he’s homeless
i laughed and said “close, my friend, i’m an artist”

popped the lock and some cashews fell out
the floor was clean so i chucked em in my mouth
five second rule, i said with a glare
that’s a lie, i eat any food anywhere

a lady walked up while i was crunchin
cl!cked her heels like edvard munchin
hands to her face like the famous scream
said we don’t partic-p-te in pyramid schemes

i laughed again and i told her “no way
i’m not herbalife, quixtar or amway
i’m just here to spread some cheer
here comes santa and the 12 reindeer”

then i let out a noxious explosion
gas from my -ss with the odor of goat skin
air turned yellow and they all started chokin
that’s real art, i’ll sign it if you got a pen

- crudbump lyrics

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