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too good at giving up - colin thomas lyrics

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can’t seem to be happy for a week
i am scared of everything
that i try to leave behind
but i can’t escape my mind
every time my room goes black
i keep digging up my past
till i’ve buried myself in it once again

can’t seem to be anything i want
i’m just a name with different fonts
just a boy tied up in knots
and a number that’s been blocked
about ten too many times
fill my pockets full with dimes
and i’ll spend it all on music and fruit-gum

and no one wants to see when i’m numb

there’s gotta be something i can do
or am i just not meant to be loved?
i’d rather feel nothing than the blue
most days i just feel like i’m stuck
my friends can tell me i’ll get through
but they can never say enough
and i guess that’s how it goes
but maybe i’m too good at giving up

(ooh…)

walking home with salt beneath my eyes
and a mouth-full of white lies
in the hoodie where i hide
from every car that p-sses by
from the green out to the grey
i shouldn’t be out this late
if my mom found out, i know that’s what she’d say

trouble as i watch the walls cave in
living on melatonin
in the room that i’m alone in
i never thought i’d grow used to the feeling of regret
and dancing with silhouettes
of the people that i cared about
but i didn’t share my whereabouts

so they left me in the blink of an eye
and two or three never said goodbye
and they all think that i’m doing fine
but here i am today
standing with friends that want me to be alright
but i can’t even f-cking do that right
and sometimes it doesn’t feel like i’m alive

i wanna close my eyes and say goodbye
i wanna close my eyes for the very last time

there’s gotta be something i can do
or am i just not meant to be loved?
i’d rather feel nothing than the blue
most days it just feels like i’m stuck
my friends can tell me i’ll get through
but they can never say enough
and i guess that’s how it goes
but maybe i’m too good at giving up

(blisters on my hands
and i am sinking through the sand
that i once swam above, swam above
twist me into what you can
the pills don’t work, so i just ran and ran
i just ran and ran…)

- colin thomas lyrics

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