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the ball thief - cock and ball conglomerate lyrics

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the ball thief lyrics
[chorus]
i’m the ball thief
i’ll steal your b*lls
then i’ll sell them
at the town mall
i’ll get you when you least expect it
take your b*lls then make an exit
i sell them to the hospital
thirty*five grand for each circle
i use the money to buy an orchard
i steal their b*lls once they’re tortured

[verse 1]
i was sitting on the toilet
taking a dump
when i saw a man whose b*lls were plump
i ducked under the stall
and i had the gall
to grab his testes
his name was paul
(he’s the ball thief and he’s out to get your t*st*cl*s, so you better run)
(he’s the ball thief ladies and gentlemen. welcome: the ball thief! wah!)
[pre*chorus]
i paid all my taxes
i give things to charity
i feed the homeless
but i steal their t*st*cl*s

[chorus]
i’m the ball thief
i’ll steal your b*lls
then i’ll sell them
at the town mall
i’ll get you when you least expect it
take your b*lls then make an exit
i sell them to the hospital
35 grand for each circle
i use the money to buy an orchard
i steal their b*lls once they’re tortured

[verse 2]
clad in a turquoise
polo and khakis
with a yellow visor
and all my lackeys
you’d better run
and steel your nerves
’cause i’ll steal your b*lls
mark my words
[bridge 1]
the man named paul
asked for his b*lls
i told him “nah”
then we had a brawl
i made him bawl
he tried to crawl
out of the mall
down his throat, i shoved his b*lls

[solo]
the ball thief
the ball thief
the ball thief
the ball thief
the ball thief
the ball thief
i’m the ball thief
i’m the ball thief!

[bridge 2]
i’ll steal your b*lls
then i’ll hide them in my walls
i’ll take both your t*st*cl*s
i’ll take ’em all
ball thief
hold your b*lls tight
’cause i’ll take them in the night
you’ll have a terrible fright
when they’re both gone
ball thief

[outro]
ball thief, ball thief
ball thief, ball thief
ball thief, ball thief
ball thief, ball thief
ball*

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