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awful feelings - cloud gavin lyrics

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the th-rn in my side slowly leaks, but the blood’s aberrant color defeats me. it’s like a dull maple leaf after winter has taken it’s toll
maybe it’s visual misconception or lack of chemical connection. though, i believe it lost it’s life before ever leaving the wound

don’t get close to me. i’ll be the one that’s always letting you down
i’m a sieve in the rain, collecting it all for nothing
i’ll be the blood that flows inside of your veins
i’ll exsanguinate your body, leaving you with nothing

so, hang me up and let me dry or throw me out and let me die
i never thought it’d be this way and now i’ll probably never change
(to cease; never again. i’ll go as you watch me fade to a darker gray.)
now it seems like i always f-ck up everything

so, get close to me. i’ll be the weight that’s always holding you down
i used to feel remorse, but now it’s hard to feel much of anything
if i could be the marrow in your bones. i’d let myself pour out and drain, as if you weren’t anything

so, hang me up and let me dry or throw me out and let me die
i never thought it’d be this way and now i’ll probably never change
(to cease; never again. i’ll go as you watch me fade to a darker gray.)
now it seems like i always f-ck up everything

so, i’ll dig a hole; one that could swallow me whole. in hopes that i’ll grow into something much taller than i’ll ever be
but, i’ll just float down that river i know, until i dissolve or erode like the blood i have lost on the way

it’s what i’m coughing up again, the blood from all my friends

when god shows his light, will i be clean? will i be honest?
will i be alive? will i be anything? will i be alone?

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