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asking 4 help - christian l da r&b ruger lyrics

asking 4 help lyrics
these are the prayers of a father
who struggles with comprehension
i prayed for* a healthy baby
the diagnosis*autism
hated every doctor*
blamed them for the issues
anger so misguided
questioning my sons mother
d*mn near got my house divided

evacuating pain in my tears
i feel the disconnect
reaching out for hugs
confusing his no’s with disrespect
buying all these toys
just looking for ways to interact
he’d rather be all by himself
it’s really hard stomach that

i’m so lost*
cataloging smiles
to starve my d*mn impatientence
hard to get support
cause we don’t trust n0body with our baby
he ain’t talking yet
but he smiling thou
i’m h*lla mad
my greatest blessing
suffering perspectives coming from his dad …
nawww
this is ur fault
i prayed and never caused you trouble
swallowed all your challenges
my son should never have to struggle
feeling like nedska
my everyday is a sudden struggle
mother fight for baby sitters
i’m fighting just to hear i love you
aba * early intervention
that’s the story now
diagnosis not the destination
but i’m screaming how
celebrating every 1st down
ignoring all the safeties
recouping any deficit they tried to lay upon my baby
shedding tears
tryna finish verses
but it’s getting harder
amazing at my craft
but feeling subpar as a f*cking father
on my knees
you listening
done praying for self
i need you now
you see me hurting lord
(i’m) asking 4 help

v2*
a little n****
grew up from the cracks in the
pavement
i seen a lot of things
that had my little mind racing
my mother said
my brother wasn’t coming back
home
i didn’t understand
i couldn’t fathom what was
wrong
my mother said
baby you gotta have thick skin
when the world pin you down
you gotta get back up again
poverty stricken
roach infested
i’m tryna level up
sitting on the porch
watching my girlfriend
playing double dutch
a lot things running thru my mind
dreams of me dying
seeing my moms crying
wishing i had wings
so she could see her baby flying
i need y’all to feel me
like the roar from a lion
my pops he was trying
it’s the thought that counts
i couldn’t blame him
for me choosing my route
running with the bad kids
grew up fast quick
i wasn’t tryna hear nothing
and you couldn’t tell me sh*t
i’m asking for help
you don’t see me reaching up to
you
i’m asking for help
you don’t see me down on my
knees
i’m asking for help
talk to me answer me please
i’m asking for help
you don’t see me reaching up to
you
i’m asking for help
you don’t see me down on my
knees
i’m asking for help
talk to me answer me please
i’m asking for help
talk to me answer me please

- christian l da rb ruger lyrics

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