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if i'm honest - charlie pittman lyrics

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[verse 1]
i wish i was a kid
or i wish i was eighty cause lately
i’ve been hating what i’m living in
oh to be so innocent
and to not have to worry or bury things
that i’ve been keeping in

[pre*chorus]
i’m not eating and i’m getting thinner
i’m not sleeping but i hope that this will pass by winter
i’m crying in waves * they crash i’m done
a minute of sadness, then i’m numb

[chorus]
and if i’m honest, i’m just exhausted
by all this time spent locked in my own head
and it’s not constant, i’m just so lost and
i wish i’d try to be a little kinder to myself

but sometimes i’d rather die
than living to survive
barely getting by cause i’m trying
not to cry every night
but my eyes hurt
givе it some time it’s all blurred
i’m not seeing straight right now

[verse 2]
homе ain’t much a home
‘least its not what it was
and now i lost my way
i guess i’ve never been this low

the uncertainty is k!lling me
i’m hoping you’ll see me hit 23
and maybe i’ll be ready to see you leave
i know i won’t

[pre*chorus]
i’m not eating and i’m getting thinner
i’m not sleeping but i hope that this will pass by winter
i’m crying in waves * they crash i’m done
a minute of sadness, then i’m numb

[chorus]
and if i’m honest, i’m just exhausted
by all this time spent locked in my own head
and it’s not constant, i’m just so lost and
i wish i’d try to be a little kinder to myself

but sometimes i’d rather die
than living to survive
barely getting by cause i’m trying
not to cry every night
but my eyes hurt
give it some time it’s all blurred
i’m not seeing straight right now

[bridge]
no point trying to hide it
acting like i’m fine cus
whats the use in lying
when the truth comes out anyway

i’ll be better with perspective
won’t win if i compress it
try to comprehend that
it’s a visitor in my brain

and if i’m honest, i’m just exhausted
by all this time spent locked in my own head
and it’s not constant, i’m just so lost and
i wish i’d try to be a little kinder to myself

but sometimes i’d rather die
than living to survive
barely getting by cause i’m trying
not to cry every night
cause my eyes hurt
give it some time it’s all blurred

i’m not seeing straight right now

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