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(a)pathetic - bradonte lyrics

everybody tells me that the good die young, so then how the h*ll am i still alive past 21?
the battle inside my mind will never be won, ’cause every time i think i’m at the top i look up and i see another rung
on the ladder
and that sh*t makes me sadder ’cause i know what just i’m after and it doesn’t even matter

i just gotta keep my focus on the here and the now
i got too many blessings in my life to ever wear a frown
but it’s hard to keep on smiling with so many up and downs, so i keep a blank face on while i run the town

whatchu know about what it’s like to have depression?
got a nagging voice inside your head for every single second, and a list a thousand miles long of things that got you stressin’, like you looking for the answer but don’t even know the question, man
you gotta pass the test if you wanna learn your lesson

talk about your feelings, don’t be scared to make confessions
you deserve to happy, and if you’re not then don’t accept it
i got dealt a sh*tty hand and i took new cards from the deck and i’mma win the whole pot, i will not settle for less, man

but at the same time, i need to get this off my chest: am i really apathetic or am i just pathetic? i been thinking it forever but now i finally said it gotta stop that train of thought i gotta find a way to dead it, but even if i come up with a method to suppress it i’m afraid it won’t be long before the feelings resurrect and drag me back in my depression, but if it do i guess it’s just another chance to learn a lesson

but that’s what i got the family for, whole system of support, faced demons before, i’m just afraid that they got more in store than we can handle so i’m turning to the drugs again and getting lit, just like a candle

yeah guys this sh*t right here… making music… it’s like one of the very few things that i actually enjoy doing. so i woke up today p*ssed as f*ck and said “ya know, f*ck it, i’mma make me a song,” and uhh, this is what we ended up with

disappeared for a couple of years, but now i’m back with a vengeance. finally working on myself for real and no more just pretending
one way or another, man this sh*t has got to end, because i’m tired of living life like i’m my only f*cking friend. what is the message that i’m trying to send? how did i end up back at square one again?
why did i think that the laws that i was breaking wouldn’t ever come back to break me in the end?
but you know what they say, every end’s a new beginning, at the end of the day i’m gonna be the one that’s winning
even as i’m spittin’ i can’t stop myself from grinnin’, head is swimmin’ at the vision of my bank accounts fillin’ to the brim

i can’t even lie i had a lot of fun makin’ runs, but that part of my life is over with and done. i just wanna rap ain’t got no love for flipping birds, but the money talk a whole lot louder than the words

- bradonte lyrics

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