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the bad review - bongwater lyrics

bongwater got panned in rolling stone and they compared me to barbra streisand
oh, god! that is the cruelest cut of them all!
or, wait a minute, maybe that’s good
brad says it’s not fair
he’s trying to calm my jangled nerves, but i have to say they accompanied the review with this really cool ill*stration
it was this map of the usa
tracing our run to new york city, and citing all our musical influences along the way
it was really a veritable pop cultural sm*rg*sbord done in the style of those old 60s’ movie posters like it’s a mad, mad, mad, mad world, and casino royale, but i’m still not sure if it was a pan
the writing was so convolutеd and semiotic
it was more like somеthing you’d read in art form or [?] magazine, but i can’t tell
i think “the bloom is off the rose now!”
why in the h*ll do i like [?]
why the h*ll do i want something?
you sure can’t argue with him
he doesn’t care, but dammit, these things bother me!
so, i* i decide to go watch the [?] movie
then, brad helps hatch a plan
he says, “we go back east, and you can milk my cow for me.”
i said, “cow? what co* oh!”
then i remember that he did have a cow back east
oh, god, i don’t wanna get on one of those dilapidated dc*10s and go back east
i* but i guess i have to prove that i’ll love him
but again?!

- bongwater lyrics

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