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talkin’ john birch paranoid blues [brandeis 1963] - bob dylan lyrics

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well, i was feelin’ sad and feelin’ blue
i didn’t know what in the world i wus gonna do
them communists they wus comin’ around
they wus in the air
they wus on the ground
they wouldn’t gimme no peace . .

so i run down most hurriedly
and joined up with the john birch society
i got me a secret membership card
and started off a-walkin’ down the road
yee-hoo, i’m a real john bircher now!
look out you commies!

now we all agree with hitler’s views
although he k!lled six million jews
it don’t matter too much that he was a fascist
at least you can’t say he was a communist!
that’s to say like if you got a cold you take a shot of malaria

well, i wus lookin’ everywhere for them gol-darned reds
i got up in the mornin’ ’n’ looked under my bed
looked in the sink, behind the door
looked in the glove compartment of my car
couldn’t find ’em . .

i wus lookin’ high an’ low for them reds everywhere
i wus lookin’ in the sink an’ underneath the chair
i looked way up my chimney hole
i even looked deep down inside my toilet bowl
they got away . .

well, i wus sittin’ home alone an’ started to sweat
figured they wus in my t.v. set
peeked behind the picture frame
got a shock from my feet, hittin’ right up in the brain
them reds caused it!
i know they did . . . them hard-core ones

well, i quit my job so i could work all alone
then i changed my name to sherlock holmes
followed some clues from my detective bag
and discovered they wus red stripes on the american flag!
that ol’ betsy ross . .

well, i investigated all the books in the library
ninety percent of ’em gotta be burned away
i investigated all the people that i knowed
ninety-eight percent of them gotta go
the other two percent are fellow birchers . . . just like me

now eisenhower, he’s a russian spy
lincoln, jefferson and that roosevelt guy
to my knowledge there’s just one man
that’s really a true american: george lincoln rockwell
i know for a fact he hates commies cus he picketed the movie exodus

well, i fin’ly started thinkin’ straight
when i run outa things to investigate
couldn’t imagine doin’ anything else
so now i’m sittin’ home investigatin’ myself!
hope i don’t find out anything . . . hmm, great god!

- bob dylan lyrics

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