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swallowing shadows - blixemi lyrics

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stuck alone, swallowing shadows
everything i’ve ever held closely has crumbled
broken code
i’m at a crossroad
do i swallow my pride, stay and hide
or face my families lies?
tied
to a history of shame
smeared names, whose to blame?
i’m trapped inside the flames, of my past, that they cast

all i ever wanted was to be something more
my family, my clan, the code, it’s all i live for
my lungs scream for air but how can i bare
to know that i am wrong right down to the core

how can i just go free when everything inside of me
has been nothing but a fabricated reality

i thought i knew my place but that’s all been erased
i’m going to die down here, i’m running out of breathing sp-ce

half-blooded, mind’s flooded in a lake of doubt
am i the punishment provided for love not allowed?
is starclan watching now? from up in the clouds?
as i tumble and i fumble deeper down into this tunnel

did they know all along, that despite it being wrong
that destiny can go beyond what the rules were set upon
does love matter where it comes from?
or is it something that we should be numb from?

but when you push love aside it doesn’t hide the lie
how can i search and find the pride of having my life divided? how could i have been misguided?

ripped as a kit quick from my mother, now split from my brothers
and it’s getting darker, and i have to wonder
am i destined to go under?
for all the sins that i’ve covered

all i ever wanted was to be something more
but now i know that i am wicked straight to the core
my lungs scream for air but how can i bare
to know i left him bleeding out on that stream sh0r-
how can i just go through, when knowing what i had to do
meant the death of someone just to keep him mute

he could have known his place, he could have made a change
he’s going to die up there, i tore away his breathing sp-ce

all i ever wanted was to be something more
i know that i am wicked straight to the core
i left him bleeding out on that stream sh0r-
my family, my clan, the code, it’s all i live for

stuck alone, swallowing shadows
half-blooded, mind’s flooded
tied
to a history of shame
does love matter where it comes from?
or is it something that we should be numb from?

all i ever wanted was to be something more
but now i know i am wicked straight to the core
i left him bleeding out on that stream sh0r-
my family, my clan, the code, it’s all i live for
it’s all i lived for
it’s all i lived for

now i’ve got nothing to live for

- blixemi lyrics

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