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the internet is for porn - avenue q lyrics

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kate monster: finally, i get to teach a whole lesson all by myself. and i’m gonna teach something relevant, something modern – the internet!
the internet is really really great,
trekkie monster: for p-rn!
kate: i’ve got a fast connection so i don’t have to wait.
trekkie: for p-rn!
kate: what?
there’s always some new site.
trekkie: for p-rn!
kate: i browse all day and night.
trekkie: for p-rn!
kate: it’s like i’m surfing at the speed of light…
trekkie: for p-rn!
kate: trekkie!
trekkie: the internet is for p-rn!
kate: trekkie!
trekkie: the internet is for p-rn!
kate: what are you doing!?
trekkie: why you think the net was born?
p-rn! p-rn! p-rn!
kate: treee-kkie!
trekkie: oh! h-llo, kate monster.
kate: you are ruining my song!
trekkie: oh me sorry, me no mean to.
kate: well, if you wouldn’t mind please being quiet for a minute so i can finish?
trekkie: okie dokie!
kate: good!

i’m glad we have this new technology…
trekkie: for p-rn!
kate: which gives us untold opportunity.
trekkie: for p-rn – oops, sorry!
kate: from your own desktop.
trekkie: for —
kate: you can research, browse and shop…
trekkie: mm!
kate: until you’ve had enough and you’re ready to stop.
trekkie: for p-rn!
kate: trekkie!

trekkie: the internet is for p-rn!
kate: nooo!
trekkie: the internet is for p-rn!
kate: trekkie!
trekkie: me up all night honking me h-rn to p-rn, p-rn, p-rn!

kate: that’s gross! you’re a pervert.
trekkie: ah, sticks and stones, kate monster.
kate: no really, you’re a pervert. normal people don’t sit at home and look at p-rn on the internet.
trekkie: ohhhh?
kate: what?!
trekkie: you have no idea! ready, normal people?
brian: ready!
gary: ready!
rod: ready!
trekkie: lemmie hear it!

trekkie and guys: the internet is for p-rn!
princeton: sorry, kate!
trekkie and guys: the internet is for p-rn!
princeton: i m-st-rb-t-!
trekkie and guys: all these guys unzip their flies for
p-rn, p-rn, p-rn!
kate: the internet is not for p-rn!
trekkie and guys: p-rn, p-rn —
kate: hold on a second!
trekkie: what?

kate: now i happen to know for a fact that you, rod, check your portfolio and trade stocks online.
rod: that’s correct.
kate: and brian, you buy things on amazon.com.
brian: sure!
kate: and gary, you keep selling your possesions on ebay.
gary: yes i do!
kate: and princeton, you sent me that sweet online birthday card.
princeton: true!
trekkie: oh, but kate, what you think he do after? hmm?
princeton: yeah.
kate: eeewwwww!

trekkie and guys: the internet is for p-rn!
kate: gross!
trekkie and guys: the internet is for p-rn!
kate: i hate p-rn!
trekkie and guys: grab your d-ck and double-click…
kate: ugh!
trekkie and guys: …for p-rn, p-rn, p-rn!
kate: i hate men!
trekkie and guys: {in harmony} p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn
kate: i’m leaving!
trekkie and guys: p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn
kate: i hate the internet!
trekkie and guys: p-rn, p-rn, p-rn, p-rn
trekkie: the internet is for
trekkie and some: internet is for
trekkie and all: internet is for p-rn!
trekkie: yeah!

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