just a kid growing up - august fanon & defcee lyrics
[intro]
i can only—really, i can only laugh to keep from crying, because what happens is that he really, i don’t really think he knows how silly that sounds. he’s going all city, i mean, to what end? and when i ask him, he says to me, “well just so people see it and they know who i am.” n0body knows who he is. and so they see it—
nah, it’s not a matter of so they know who i am
so they see it and then after they see it, so what?
it’s a matter of bombing, knowing that i can do it, you know. every time i get in the train, almost every day, i see my name. i say, yeah, you know what, i was there, i bombed it. it’s a matter—it’s for me, it’s not for n0body else to see. i don’t carе, i don’t care about n0body else seeing it. or thе fact if they can read it or not. it’s for me and other graffiti writers, that we can read it. all these other people who don’t write, they excluded, i don’t care about them, you know, they don’t matter to me, it’s for us
[verse 1: defcee]
look, a gem with a flaw is just flesh when it’s scarred
mom gardened, tryna grow treasure chests in the yard
trust was a soft spot, affection was hard
why my hugs felt like i was accepting a charge
electric guitars worth of noise in my eyes
trauma’s the years after when the poison survives
while my pops wrote a book about lawyers and bribes
i was toyin’ with rhymes like the oinks do a crime
the love was unconditional as long as you dope
sharp enough to talk initials into carbon and oak
days weighing us with burdens that the darkness had broke
the thing about diamonds in the rough, their dusty charms are a hoax
all our parents all heard were awkward nerds unlockin’ words
every february at the high house, flocked in furs
in the circle, choppin’ nerves, smilin’ and dappin’
my style was draggin’ until time stopped just to catch it
[hook: defcee]
v pulled a blade on me
toaster tagged my cd case
picked up game from jose and nate
in the celica with screeching brakes
[?] believed when i was garbage
christa flipped kaleidoscopes to language and collages
slime, q, and speedy reminded me what i wasn’t
avery stayed takin’ home higher scores in the dozens
tk wore avengers, nova was the realest
my parents raised me fearful, writing made me fearless
[verse 2: defcee]
look, look, look
created the earth with our fingerprints
painted in perfect and intricate
skated the surface of innocence
we made up a church and some history
debated who verse at the end of ’em
weight of the world was our emblem
taste of the [?] was medicine
stains on the shirts [?]
sweat every element out of our bodies
and strengthen our names to a letter or two
shootin’ our shot at a party
prayin’ it’d drop but it never fell through the hoop
l!ckin’ the tip of my thumb and scrubbin’ a smudge off the edge of a swoop
spendin’ like eighty percent of my loot
pressing cds for my friends to recoup, phew
solo flight out of nest or a coop
heroes [?]
size of our egos was stretching the booth
[?] on forever, replenishing youth
death hadn’t met us, it cut us a break
left all our sentences up to the fates
most of us ducked in its face, some of us hurtin’ too much
couldn’t stomach the weight
tatted their faces and government names
over and under the veins
death or destruction ahead of us
we didn’t care, seein’ love in the way
pictures went fuzzy, we brushed ’til it changed
failin’ my history tests because of the dates
but always remembered the tunnels and trains
always remembered the tunnels and trains
man…
[hook: defcee]
v pulled a blade on me
toaster tagged my cd case
picked up game from jose and nate
in the celica with screeching brakes
[?] believed when i was garbage
christa flipped kaleidoscopes to language and collages
slime, q, and speedy reminded me what i wasn’t
avery stayed takin’ home higher scores in the dozens
tk wore avengers, nova was the realest
my parents raised me fearful, writing made me fearless
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