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the fishes - antighost lyrics

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i have people who say they care for me
and i’m so scared of the man i’m supposed to be
i’ve got lovers who i haven’t spoke to in months
and my mother wants to meet for brunch

i’ve so many friends that i’ve let down
i’m anemic with a torn paper crown
i’ve got brothers who i haven’t spoke to in months
and my father is calling me for lunch

when he asks me if i’m doing okay
and it’s getting so much harder to say
and i know that it isn’t quite his fault
that i’m falling apart, i’m falling apart
i’m so sick of bleeding underneath my shirt
and always wishing i could sleep forever in the dirt
when i go into my bed i smell of smoke
and thе ash i breathe and the pukе it makes me choke

but the fishes ask if i’m okay
and i lie to them and i don’t know what to say
cause at the end of the day i’m drowning in my tears
just so they can breathe but i’ll never fight the fears

and you ask me if i’m doing okay
and it’s getting so much harder to say
i’ve been sober for the past two three days
but a month it just seems so far away
but a month it just seems so far away

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