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cheat code - angel cuji lyrics

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verse 1:

stared in the glass for too long
i met the boy who’s alone
he hides behind the covers
of a man tryna recover

oh all the places we’ve known
all of the lovers’ headstones
don’t keep those tears from fallin’
it’s just routine of mourning

and when the strangers sing
that song from that one fling
touch echoes through my skin
magnetic—pull me in

i sigh and let out a laugh
place my old candles out back
hope i’ll see you ‘gain someday
here comes another birthday

chorus:

so do i intend
to keep playing pretend
i’m done
i don’t wanna keep on getting old
one day i was 15
next day could buy a drink
i’m holdin’
onto everythin that i knew

my favorite records’ grew mold
our memories decomposed but
some they linger like the voicemails in my phone

i wish they could just reveal
that life’s a game—nothings real
so i could use a f*cking cheat code

verse 2:

another moment to grieve
my dreams at 17
i wonder what he’d say
if he came over my place

would he be proud of me
or would he get up and leave
promise i’m trying my best
please don’t think of me less

i’m thankful for all my friends
even those who burned down the bridge
cause i still hold the ashes
in the pockets of my jacket
and i keep the good times replaying
in my heart the fire’s still ablaze
pray at night they’ll always be safe
see their face on parallel trains

chorus:

so do i intend
to keep playing pretend
i’m done
i don’t wanna keep on getting old

one day i was 15
next day could buy a drink
i’m holding
onto everything that i knew

my favorite records grew mold
our memories decomposed but
some they linger like the voicemails in my phone

i wish they could just reveal
that life’s a game—nothings real
so i could use a f*cking cheat code

bridge:
no matter what i’ll do
there’s nothing that could remove
self depreciation galore
i wipe myself with the floor

past places i once called home
they all remain war zones
i amputate the memories
into a box and welded the key

to a necklace gilded so gold
something i could pass down to my own
like all the stories i’ll tell, but
first i gotta help myself

’cause one blink and that will be me
on the edge of 33
til then i’ll have to be here
heal the wounds, embrace the fear

chorus:

so do i intend
to keep playing pretend
i’m done
i don’t wanna keep on getting old

one day i was 15
next day could buy a drink
i’m holding
onto everything that i knew

my favorite records grew mold
our memories decomposed
but some they linger like the voicemails in my phone

i wish they could just reveal
that life’s a game—nothings real
so i could use a f*cking cheat code

outro:

still playin those same old songs
when sh*t keeps going wrong
i could use a f*cking cheat code

your hometown starts to look gray
like the hair from your parent’s face
i could use a f*cking cheat code

chapters of friendship complete
your loved ones start to retreat
i could use a f*cking cheat code

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