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suicide - anemic lyrics

[verse 1]
i take these pills to make me feel a sense of relief
and disbelief of the sh-t that’s been thrown at me
i cut my skin to see how much it bleeds
i plead to see how much my hunger feeds
i cut my skin just to avoid every sin
i repented the infinite just to see if my life would win
but since then, it’s been an insane ride
with no love and racing thoughts of suicide
before i’d have looks, i’d bleach my hair
or just cut it all off, and my skin while the knife is there
where do i belong during the end of the song?
not here, it’s all hate and high takes, if i’m not wrong
i’m a rebel, but all my rage is still bottled
no love is my fault partially but these thoughts are just swallowed
if i could, i would sincerely apologize
for all the lies that have made our lives so melancholy-mesmerized

[verse 2]
do you ever feel like everybody just hates you?
i do, i can barely stand when everyone can barely take you
i’ve sufferred pain for the sh-t that i’ve said
i cut my wrist just for the bloodshed
because it’s the pain that i know i’ve always deserved
i’d rather bleed than hear hurtful words that are just reserved
it’s a secret so deep that races thoughts unning head to feet
it seeps through but it’s the darkness that my soul can never keep
it makes me want to weep when that’s all i wanna do
but you never hear me say sorry when i was calling you
you insult me and make me feel like what i am – trash
i live in a trailer with a hurtful mother and barely any cash
we’re poor with no money and i try my best to hide it
i can’t take it anymore, so i’m bound by suicide
i justlook back to the happy memories
and i stop the sparks of “electricity” electrically

[verse 3]
i remember they’ll never be back and they are so few
but that’s what happens when so few people even know you
spitting old school rhymes to get sh-t off of my chest
showing that i’ve suffered so much more than the rest of the rest
it’s a test of how much i can even withstand
i am mad but i’m still sad because it’s just the thing that i can’t stand
i’ve taken so much cr-p over the past four years
drama’s a b-tch, but it makes me cower and tremble in fear
the end is near for the story that lasted so queet
i’m insulted which resulted to suicidal thoughts here
sometimes i wanna grab the gun and blow my brains out
or never drop a knife again and cut into my veins now
i steal pills and swallow them to give this feeling
of slight happiness for once but it leads to more stealing
it’s stupid to take drugs to get what i’ve never had
happiness – but my life continues to be forever sad
i ignore the pain and all the false love
and remember it’s all fake with no friends or fun stuff
i’ll jump off a building so i can breathe one last time
enjoy the view for the rest of my life as i rap one last line

- anemic lyrics

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