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disquietude - anathema lyrics

just thought i’d rest my tired mind, and my weary eyes
indulge in respite hits from my sh-tty gas station pipe
dear calc would understand if i needed a quick five
(and thus commenced the advent of a long, hazy ride)
spiraling down, from that renowned eden they say is on high
melting shades and hues, keep folding as they float idly by
my gaze, is raised
to the way the images crease and change
they split and shift along the x as they revolve about y
oh wait–i’m high—too high
c.f., i’m baked out my mind
i.e., derivatives seem to be
far too beyond me to find
e.g., that’s not even what this question’s asking me to define
ergo, conclusion: yes, we can, obama
but not at this time—
i’m slowly arriving at the distant realization
that i’ve smoked a lot more weed
than would behoove my concentration
on the pages and the problems they contain
to my frustration–
though this is no deviation
from the norm, nor aberration
and now i really want all that hazy sedation
a premium variety of figurative haven
despite the priorities
that are prominent
and blatant
snuffed
by my inner
underachiever—
not so latent
just give me that low-eyed elation
i can’t hold my liquor
and no funds for medication found on pharmacy
shelves
and soccer moms across the nation
i can’t judge but the superior
drug of choice
by my discrimination
is my weed

hence
the buying buds
packing bowls
and smoking that weed
i pack it tighter, lighter up
my eyes too slitted to see
though my scattered thoughts
can’t cloud
what looms over me:
i’m running out of excuses
i’m
running out of reasons
why
i’m
unable to get my mind
right
i’m
running out of excuses
there’s nothing left for me to blame
there’s
nothing left for me to blame
for
why always it stays the same
way
every f-cking year no matter what i do or what i say
there’s
nothing left for me to blame
for
why always it stays the same
way
every f-cking day no matter what i do or what i say

my
diligence attempt: that’s execrable
and f-ck i’m gonna
have to learn
this again:
that’s regrettable; can’t in good faith
bemoan the wasted time:
that’s preventable
and though i want to be blameless
not even i am so
easily
impressionable
to heed
my cerebral wiles
and sleep effort-
lessly
i know my underachievement is solely
because of me
myself
and i
there’s
no one else to blame
and i shouldn’t even try
because
of other futures on the line
the clock is ticking
and i run on borrowed time
sooner or later
the
facts–will
present
themselves to be faced
when
reality
arrives
settles itself
as
it looks me in the eye
antic-p-ting
my reaction while i
proceed to simply stare
right back at it with a seeming resolve
only to stop, ‘cause
it’s easier
to turn away
and just
keep on

buying buds
packing bowls
and smoking that weed
i pack it tighter, lighter up
my eyes too slitted to see
though my scattered thoughts
can’t cloud
what looms over me:
i’m running out of excuses
i’m
running out of reasons
why
i’m
unable to get my mind
right
i’m
running out of excuses
there’s nothing left for me to blame
there’s
nothing left for me to blame
for
why always it stays the same
way
every f-cking year no matter what i do or what i say
there’s
nothing left for me to blame
for
why always it stays the same
way
every f-cking day no matter what i do or what i say

- anathema lyrics

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