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stop the hand - ​an unkindness lyrics

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you see dating’s just a tool i use
to figure out that i don’t love someone
my heart is a clock but i just sleep through my alarm
and now it seems i’ve finally found someone
but his heart belongs to someone else
i can’t stop the hand from turning with my arm

so it’s just another night i cannot sleep
just another flashing light i’m forced to see
but at least i’ve tried. i’ve tried so hard to close my eyes
and sleep through my screams

and now it seems i’ve lost myself
what i want today might change as well
chasing my way out of h*ll
with invisible tape on my damaged sh*ll
and he really likes me too, i guess
with all those nights we spent undressed
i hope, to him, i’m not just someone else
and we listened to the pain we shared
as we walked and talked in the cold night air
and i told him he was filling up a void
i said “holes they can dig deeply, yes
they can eat you up inside your chest so
listen close while i digest and
tell you why my eyes are red
it was just another sign i could not see
it was just the final time she made me bleed
and she saw me cry when i was tired of all her lies
then she turned from me.”

now the stress shows through my face
with more tension in my living sp*ce
finally come face to face
with the man i thought would scare me away
but we stayed up all night like before
each story told made me think more
that i hope that he will trust in me someday
cuz i’m not just gonna lie right to his face
so i hope that i don’t make the same mistakes

but i’ll try
to decide
something for myself
without someone to guide my mind
but i’ll still deny
that i’d be happier if i kept my mind off “why”
oh, why?
oh, why?
oh, why?
oh, why?
oh, why?
oh, why?
it was just another mask i’ve come to be
it was just another insecurity
but at least i’ve tried. you can’t deny that i’ve tried
to see objectively

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